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It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

Joseph Heller

The enemy is anybody who’s going to get you killed, no matter which side he is on.
JOSEPH HELLER

Enemy Kill War
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
JOSEPH HELLER

Achievement Born Medicore Mediocrity Men Sarcastic Thrust
He knew everything there was to know about literature, except how to enjoy it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Enjoyment Except Literature
She was the epitome of stately sorrow each time she smiled.
JOSEPH HELLER

Epitome She Smile Sorrow Time
Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.
JOSEPH HELLER

Air Exercise Fresh Meet Opportunity People Prostitution Trouble
You know, that might be the answer – to act boastfully about something we ought to be ashamed of. That’s a trick that never seems to fail.
JOSEPH HELLER

Ashame Failure Trick
Well, he died. You don’t get any older than that.
JOSEPH HELLER

Broken Heart Die Old
In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
JOSEPH HELLER

Accident Failure Predict
The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren’t paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you.
JOSEPH HELLER

Ignorance Law Mind Nature Paranoid Promote
It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.
JOSEPH HELLER

Dead Difference War Win
Rise above principal and do what’s right.
JOSEPH HELLER

Inspirational One Liner Principle Right Rise
Insanity is contagious.
JOSEPH HELLER

Contagious Insane One Liner
When I look up, I see people cashing in. I don’t see heaven or saints or angels. I see people cashing in on every decent impulse and every human tragedy.
JOSEPH HELLER

Angel Decent Heaven Human Impulse Poeple Saint Tragedy
Frankly, I’d like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.
JOSEPH HELLER

Government Industry Private Togetherness
Never quit a job as a matter of principle. You’ll always regret it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Job Principle Quit Regret
I’ve only had four ideas for a novel in my life, and I’ve written all of them.
JOSEPH HELLER

Ideas Life Novel Writing
From men motivated by moral certitude, history teaches, no lasting good ever comes.
JOSEPH HELLER

Goodness History Moral Teaching
History was a trash bag of random coincidences torn open in a wind.
JOSEPH HELLER

Bag Coincidence History Open Random Trash Wind
Remember that everyone deserves some fun during working hours.
JOSEPH HELLER

Deserve Fun Leadership Work
You’re an intelligent person of great moral character who has taken a very courageous stand. I’m an intelligent person with no moral character at all, so I’m in an ideal position to appreciate it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Appreciation Character Courage Intelligence Moral
While none of the work we do is very important, it is important that we do a great deal of it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Deal Greatness Important Work
Every writer I know has trouble writing.
JOSEPH HELLER

Trouble Writer Writing
For war there is always enough. It’s peace that’s expensive.
JOSEPH HELLER

Enough Expensive Peace War
They agreed that it was neither possible nor necessary to educate people who never questioned anything.
JOSEPH HELLER

Agree Education Necessary People Possible Question
But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents.
JOSEPH HELLER

Children Favor Influence Liberation Parents War
Something did happen to me somewhere that robbed me of confidence and courage and left me with a fear of discovery and change and a positive dread of everything unknown that may occur.
JOSEPH HELLER

Change Confidence Courage Discovery Dread Fear Lost
Anything worth dying for is certainly worth living for.
JOSEPH HELLER

Die Inspirational Live Positive Worth

It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

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It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

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Popular Authors

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