Remember that everyone deserves some fun during working hours.
JOSEPH HELLERWhen people disagreed with him he urged them to be objective.
More Joseph Heller Quotes
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It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.
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All of my books deal in a very rough, rude fashion with subjects about which there are great conflicts of opinion.
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I’ve only had four ideas for a novel in my life, and I’ve written all of them.
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Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t after you.
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Something did happen to me somewhere that robbed me of confidence and courage and left me with a fear of discovery and change and a positive dread of everything unknown that may occur.
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Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.
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The villains will come along. There were plenty in the Carter administration, and there will be plenty with Reagan.
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He knew everything there was to know about literature, except how to enjoy it.
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I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy.
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She was the epitome of stately sorrow each time she smiled.
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Frankly, I’d like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.
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Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.
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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
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Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
JOSEPH HELLER