A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.
H. L. MENCKENOn one issue, at least, men and women agree. They both distrust women.
More H. L. Mencken Quotes
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Imagine the Creator as a low comedian, and at once the world becomes explicable.
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The one permanent emotion of the inferior man is fear – fear of the unknown, the complex, the inexplicable. What he wants above everything else is safety.
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On one issue, at least, men and women agree. They both distrust women.
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Change is not progress.
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Always remember this: If you don’t attend the funerals of your friends, they will certainly not attend yours.
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A sense of humor always withers in the presence of the messianic delusion, like justice and the truth in front of patriotic passion.
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Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.
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Most people want security in this world, not liberty.
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For every problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong.
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Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
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If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner.
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Equality before the law is probably forever unattainable. It is a noble ideal, but it can never be realized, for what men value in this world is not rights but privileges.
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In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.
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Sometimes the idiots outvote the sensible people.
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Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.
H. L. MENCKEN






