black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.

Erma Bombeck

Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.
ERMA BOMBECK

Family Food Funny Planning Politics Religion
I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes.
ERMA BOMBECK

Clothes Live Luck Myself Society
I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
ERMA BOMBECK

Exercise Insect Inspiration Woman
If I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished ever moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
ERMA BOMBECK

Chance God Growth Life Magic Moments Myself Pregnant
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
ERMA BOMBECK

Home Ideas Myself See Work
Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.
ERMA BOMBECK

Body Born Children Deep Mom Pregnant
I read one psychologist’s theory that said, “Never strike a child in your anger.” When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he’s recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday?
ERMA BOMBECK

Angry Book Children Family Funny Hands Kiss Myself Reading Theory Yourself
It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
ERMA BOMBECK

Family Judgement Mom Understand
My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
ERMA BOMBECK

Bed Boredom Family Mom Myself
When humor goes, there goes civilization.
ERMA BOMBECK

Civilization Humor Loss
When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.
ERMA BOMBECK

Children Family Funny Mom Myself Safety
Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.
ERMA BOMBECK

Home Result Stop Work
There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.
ERMA BOMBECK

Fun Funny Mother Water Wrong
Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it’s still snowing.
ERMA BOMBECK

Children Clean Funny Home Mom
Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can’t see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
ERMA BOMBECK

Age Eye Kind Memories Old Perspective Thinking
There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
ERMA BOMBECK

Happiness Hurt Laughter Pain Tragedy

Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Erma Bombeck Quotes