One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.
ERMA BOMBECKOne thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.
ERMA BOMBECKI got to thinking one day about all those women on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night.
ERMA BOMBECKThere is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
ERMA BOMBECKA grandparent will help you with your buttons, your zippers, and your shoelaces and not be in any hurry for you to grow up.
ERMA BOMBECKGrandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
ERMA BOMBECKWomen are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden.
ERMA BOMBECKThe grass is always greener over the septic tank.
ERMA BOMBECKVolunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation’s compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.
ERMA BOMBECKGiving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.
ERMA BOMBECKWhen my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.
ERMA BOMBECKGuilt: the gift that keeps on giving.
ERMA BOMBECKWhen you look like your passport photo, it’s time to go home.
ERMA BOMBECKHousework, if it is done properly, can cause brain damage.
ERMA BOMBECKWhen humor goes, there goes civilization.
ERMA BOMBECKHumor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It’s unbridled, its unplanned, it’s full of suprises.
ERMA BOMBECKIf I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished ever moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
ERMA BOMBECK