When humor goes, there goes civilization.
ERMA BOMBECKHe who laughs lasts.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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He who laughs lasts.
ERMA BOMBECK -
I read one psychologist’s theory that said, “Never strike a child in your anger.” When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he’s recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday?
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My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
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Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
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One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.
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People usually survive their illnesses, but the paper work eventually does them in. Filing a claim for insurance is terminal.
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There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.
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There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
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When you’re lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility.
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For years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.
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When you look like your passport photo, it’s time to go home.
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I worry about scientists discovering that lettuce has been fattening all along.
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My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.
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Children make your life important.
ERMA BOMBECK