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There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.

Dorothy Parker

Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death God
It’s not the tragedies that kill us; it’s the messes.
DOROTHY PARKER

Kill Mess Myself Tragedy
The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt.
DOROTHY PARKER

Appearance Fashion Lost Myself
The only dependable law of life – everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.
DOROTHY PARKER

Depend Law Life Thinking Worst Yourself
Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness.
DOROTHY PARKER

Boredom Elegant Manner Right
Don’t feel bad when I die; I’ve been dead for a long time.
DOROTHY PARKER

Bad Death Feeling Myself Time
And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.
DOROTHY PARKER

Himself Run Stay
You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.
DOROTHY PARKER

Old Teaching Trick Yourself
It was written without fear and without research.
DOROTHY PARKER

Fear Research Writing
Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
DOROTHY PARKER

Alcohol Quick Vice
The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.
DOROTHY PARKER

Food Forever People
His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets.
DOROTHY PARKER

Bed Himself Voice
There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
DOROTHY PARKER

Funny Life Study Theft Yourself
Should they whisper false of you, Never trouble to deny; Should the words they say be true, Weep and storm and say they lie.
DOROTHY PARKER

Deny Fake Lying Storm Trouble
Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away.
DOROTHY PARKER

Fingers Hands Leaving Love Wisdom
[On the ringing of her doorbell or telephone:] What fresh hell is this?
DOROTHY PARKER

Funny Hell Herself Phone

There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.

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There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Dorothy Parker Quotes