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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

Dick Gregory

In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago, it’s a sport.
DICK GREGORY

Duty Place Right Sports Vote
Last time I was down South I walked into this restaurant, and this white waitress came up to me and said: ‘We don’t serve colored people here.’ I said: ‘that’s all right, I don’t eat colored people. Bring me a whole fried chicken.
DICK GREGORY

Eat Food Myself Oppression People Right Time
There’s a God force inside of you that gives you a will to live.
DICK GREGORY

Force God Live Willing Yourself
When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship.
DICK GREGORY

Funny Lost Money Myself Weapon
I believe young voters will either vote for Obama or not vote at all. So the problem is not Obama the problem is the system. If you think about how mess up this country is, most folk really don’t have choices.
DICK GREGORY

Believe Choice Mess Myself Problem Vote
When you’ve got something really good, you don’t have to force it on people. They will steal it!
DICK GREGORY

Force Goodness People Yourself
I’m not a comic. I’m a humorist.
DICK GREGORY

Career Laughter Myself
My belief is, you know, certain things have to be explained that’s never been explained.
DICK GREGORY

Belief Explanation Myself
Revolution ain’t nothing but an extent of evolution; Evolution is a fact of nature.
DICK GREGORY

Nature Revolution
Everything we do we should look at in terms of millions of people who can’t afford it.
DICK GREGORY

Gratitude People Rich Thankful Worth
You know, I always say white is not a color, white is an attitude, and if you haven’t got trillions of dollars in the bank that you don’t need, you can’t be white.
DICK GREGORY

Attitude Money Need Yourself
My mother was the sweetest lady who ever lived on this planet, but if you tried to tell her that Jesus wasn’t a Christian, she would stomp you to death.
DICK GREGORY

Death Live Mom Myself Yourself
You know why Madison Avenue advertising has never done well in Harlem? We’re the only ones who know what it means to be Brand X.
DICK GREGORY

Oneself Secret Yourself
The only good thing about the good old days is they’re gone.
DICK GREGORY

Goodness Past
Even though he understood the depths of racism and black oppression, Ali lived his life as a free man—a free loving and lovable man.
DICK GREGORY

Black Deep Life Love Man Oppression Race Understand
They told me there was very little racial prejudice in Hawaii. Like a woman is just a little bit pregnant.
DICK GREGORY

Myself Pregnant Woman

I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

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