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Great humorists are great insulters.

Dick Cavett

Being the offspring of English teachers is a mixed blessing. When the film star says to you, on the air, ‘It was a perfect script for she and I,’ inside your head you hear, in the sarcastic voice of your late father, ‘Perfect for she, eh? And perfect for I, also?’
DICK CAVETT

Blessing Head Movie Myself Perfection Teacher
By the time I was in the fourth grade, I sounded exactly like my father on the phone.
DICK CAVETT

Father Myself Phone Sound Time
Every so often, there is an article saying the old kind of talk show isn’t possible now. In the oldest kind of talk show, you only had the choice of that or two other channels!
DICK CAVETT

Article Channel Choice Kind Old Possible
It was at a vividly bad time in Norman Mailer’s life that I met him, and a sort of water-treading time in mine. He had stabbed his wife, and I was a copy boy at Time magazine.
DICK CAVETT

Bad Life Magazine Time Wife
I think we live in an age of increasing mediocrity.
DICK CAVETT

Age Average Live Thinking
I think I’d be pretty easy to write for.
DICK CAVETT

Easy Myself Pretty Thinking Writing
The information superhighway? That sounds like a place that’s long and boring and kills 50,000 people a year.
DICK CAVETT

Information Kill People Place Sound
Greatly talented performers don’t know – often spectacularly – what’s best for them, don’t know what their talents really are, and don’t know what’s just plain wrong for them.
DICK CAVETT

Best Dumb Great Talent Unknown Wrong
Perhaps the saddest irony of depression is that suicide happens when the patient gets a little better and can again function sufficiently.
DICK CAVETT

Better Depression Function Patience Sadness Suicide
To call New York’s traffic at holiday time a nightmare is to understate.
DICK CAVETT

Holiday Night Time Traffic
I have a disturbing problem with losing things. My vulnerability to loss-distress could properly be labeled not only inordinate, but neurotic.
DICK CAVETT

Disturb Label Lose Myself Problem Vulnerable
I feel sorry for the poor kids whose parents feel they’re qualified to teach them at home. Of course, some parents are smarter than some teachers, but in the main I see home-schooling as misguided foolishness.
DICK CAVETT

Children Feeling Fools Guide Home Parents Poor Smart
I hate Danny Kaye movies.
DICK CAVETT

Hate Movie Myself
I confess, I do have to remind myself almost daily that there are people on this earth capable of reading, writing, eating and dressing themselves who believe their lives are ruled from billions of miles away, by the stars – and, of course, the planets.
DICK CAVETT

Believe Confession Live Planet Reading Reminder Space
It’s a tribute to the human brain that anyone is able to function out there on television in a talk situation that is entirely artificial.
DICK CAVETT

Artificial Function Human Situation Tribute
Electronic devices dislike me. There is never a day when something isn’t ailing.
DICK CAVETT

Day Device Myself Sick

Great humorists are great insulters.

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Great humorists are great insulters.

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