“Every time someone says, ‘You know, we really ought to get together,’ if I were really honest, I would ask ‘Why?’”

I think I’d be pretty easy to write for.

Lawyers work hard and, like us, they’re human, many of them.

When I’m doing an appearance somewhere and taking questions from the audience, I can always count on: ‘Tell about the guy who died on your show!’

The emotions in all true anxiety dreams are next to unbearable.

Every so often, there is an article saying the old kind of talk show isn’t possible now. In the oldest kind of talk show, you only had the choice of that or two other channels!

I’ll be happy if I can just stay out of Nebraska.

I think we live in an age of increasing mediocrity.

I’ve actually gotten so I don’t associate television with entertainment very much.

Perhaps the saddest irony of depression is that suicide happens when the patient gets a little better and can again function sufficiently.

Chris Matthews can’t start any sentence without ‘Let me ask you this… ‘ And I love Chris Matthews! But almost everybody in journalism does it. Who’s stopping you? Just say it!

In the main, ghosts are said to be forlorn and generally miserable, if not downright depressed. The jolly ghost is rare.

You have to be on TV a surprisingly long time before you’re stopped on the street. Then, when you are, you get a lot of, ‘Hey, you’re great! What’s your name again?’

Censorship feeds the dirty mind more than the four-letter word itself.

As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.

Nobody is going to try to confiscate guns, although some Web sites know better: President Obama, they are certain, wants to.

I’m not all that enthralled by show business, and I’m not that much of a highbrow.

You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.

Our daily objectives should include an honest effort to improve on yesterday.

I learned so much from listening to people. And all I knew was, the only thing I had was honesty and openness.

I trust kids far more than I do adults. Kids give you the honest opinion. They tell the truth.

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.

I would never, ever sell my soul.

Honesty is for the most part less profitable than dishonesty

No matter how plain a woman may be, if truth and honesty are written across her face, she will be beautiful.