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The information superhighway? That sounds like a place that’s long and boring and kills 50,000 people a year.

Dick Cavett

The brain process that results in a joke materializing where no joke was before remains a mystery. I’m not aware of any scholarly, scientific or neurological studies on the subject.
DICK CAVETT

Brain Joke Mystery Process Result Study Subject
Every student of comedy should see Dame Edna at least twice.
DICK CAVETT

Comedy See Student
Perhaps the saddest irony of depression is that suicide happens when the patient gets a little better and can again function sufficiently.
DICK CAVETT

Better Depression Function Patience Sadness Suicide
My dream was maybe someday, one night I can be a guest on a talk show, and then I will have achieved everything I want.
DICK CAVETT

Achievement Dreams Myself Night Someday
A biggest mistake I made when I started doing a talk show was I thought you had to read the books.
DICK CAVETT

Big Book Mistake Reading Start Yourself
While other kids were out playing and doing healthy things, I read an ancient judo book with a neck hold that was fatal to so many people they finally dropped it from judo.
DICK CAVETT

Book Children Fatal Myself Neck Reading
I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn’t include someone the size of the Hindenburg.
DICK CAVETT

Comic Myself See Show Stand
I find most ‘sacred music’ pretty dismal.
DICK CAVETT

Finding Music Myself Sacred
Just think of all the billions of coincidences that don’t happen.
DICK CAVETT

Chance Coincidence Thinking
Unpleasant reading on the subject of anger tells us that there’s not really anything wrong with it. In limited amounts. It can even be a good thing. A pressure valve.
DICK CAVETT

Amount Limitation Pressure Reading Subject Wrong
The emotions in all true anxiety dreams are next to unbearable.
DICK CAVETT

Anxiety Bear Dreams Emotion True
A grown man, weeping, is a tough thing to see.
DICK CAVETT

Growth Man See Tough
Home schooling as an idea is on a par with home dentistry.
DICK CAVETT

Dentist Home Ideas School
The trick to writing for people is, you have to be able to turn them on in your head. And know how they’d word something or how they’d inflect it.
DICK CAVETT

Head Inflection Trick Word Writing Yourself
Running my show is really like an actor being in repertory but where, in one day in one performance, you do scenes from a drama, a farce, a low comedy and a tragedy.
DICK CAVETT

Oneself Performance Scene Show Tragedy
I hate Danny Kaye movies.
DICK CAVETT

Hate Movie Myself

The information superhighway? That sounds like a place that’s long and boring and kills 50,000 people a year.

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The information superhighway? That sounds like a place that’s long and boring and kills 50,000 people a year.

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