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New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

Brendan Behan

There is no human situation so miserable that it cannot be made worse by the presence of a policeman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Made Miserable Situation
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny
He was born an Englishman and remained one for years.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Born Country Irish People Years
When I’m talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation.
BRENDAN BEHAN

People Talking Way
Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!
BRENDAN BEHAN

Critics Eunuchs Themselves
Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Inspirational Irish People Psychosis
I ruined my health drinking to other people’s.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinking People Ruined
I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Children Married Painter
I cannot imagine any crime worse than taking a life, can you? -It’d depend whose life.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Capital Crime Imagine Punishment
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss
I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Alcohol Drinking Two
Most horror movies are certainly that.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cinema Horror Most
Scream at God if that’s the only thing that will get results.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Prayer Results Scream
There’s no bad publicity except an obituary.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Bad Obituary Publicity
A man is fortunate if he encounters living examples of vice, as well as of virtue, to inspire him.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Inspire Men Role Models
You made one mistake. You married me.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cynical Married Mistake

New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

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New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

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