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New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

Brendan Behan

There’s no bad publicity except an obituary.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Bad Obituary Publicity
In a society which really supported marriage the wife would be encouraged to go to the office and make love to her husband on the company’s time and with its blessing.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Blessing Husband Marriage
When I’m talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation.
BRENDAN BEHAN

People Talking Way
A man is fortunate if he encounters living examples of vice, as well as of virtue, to inspire him.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Inspire Men Role Models
Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!
BRENDAN BEHAN

Critics Eunuchs Themselves
Every cripple has his own way of walking.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cripples Walking Way
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny
There is no human situation so miserable that it cannot be made worse by the presence of a policeman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Made Miserable Situation
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Marriage Sexy
What the hell difference does it make, left or right? There were good men lost on both sides.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Differences History Men
Scream at God if that’s the only thing that will get results.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Prayer Results Scream
I’m a drinker with a writing problem.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinkers Problem Writing
I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Dublin Irish Life People
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss
Ninety-seven saint days a year wouldn’t affect the theater, but two Yom Kippurs would ruin it.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Saint Theatre Two Years
Most horror movies are certainly that.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cinema Horror Most

New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

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New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.

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