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I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me.

Brendan Behan

Scream at God if that’s the only thing that will get results.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Prayer Results Scream
Pound notes are the best religion in the world.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Money World
A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles … it takes your mind off the cost of living.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cost General Living Mind War
I cannot imagine any crime worse than taking a life, can you? -It’d depend whose life.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Capital Crime Imagine Punishment
Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Determination Men Suicide
When two men fight over a woman it’s the fight they want, not the woman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Fighting Men Two Woman
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Marriage Sexy
Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Friendship Hurt Writing
I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Dublin Irish Life People
He was born an Englishman and remained one for years.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Born Country Irish People Years
It is a good deed to forget a poor joke
BRENDAN BEHAN

Deeds Forget Poor
New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Funny Irish People Spiritual
Every cripple has his own way of walking.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cripples Walking Way
When I’m talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation.
BRENDAN BEHAN

People Talking Way
Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!
BRENDAN BEHAN

Critics Eunuchs Themselves
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss

I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me.

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I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me.

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