I’ve always thought that the key to a good sex life is variety. That’s why God gave me two hands. Humans love sex, we need sex, it’s how we connect, it reminds us we’re alive, it’s the third most basic human need, after food and good movie popcorn.
BILLY CRYSTALWhen you realize you want to invest the rest of your lifestyle with somebody, you want the rest of your life to commence as quickly as achievable.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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When I’ve gotten criticism, it’s that it’s too long, too soft, didn’t hit the government hard enough. Then when I do hit the government, they go, What’s he doing hitting the government?
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I used to limp around my neighborhood imitating him. I did my Bar Mitzvah with an Oklahoma drawl.
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Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.
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As a director and an actor, I encourage improvisation but in character and in the moment of what it is.
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I started examining history and then everything related to the theater. History, art, all the other studies, if I could link them into the theater, then it became alive for me. It just opened up my eyes.
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I love doing it [hosting the Oscars] because I love the danger of it and you have to come through and think on your feet.
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At some point I stopped stand-up because I didn’t have something to say on a nightly basis.
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Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck’s puff pastries.
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Did you ever reach a point in your life, where you say to yourself, ‘This is the best I’m ever going to look, the best I’m ever going to feel, the best I’m ever going to do,’ and it ain’t that great?
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You have to always remember they’re not your own kids. Play with them, love them, spoil them to death – then hand them back.
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[I did impressions] of relatives because I heard so many different sounds. My dad was in the music business and of course my uncle was a giant [music producer], but my dad in particular had the house filled with these Dixieland jazz stars.
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Change is such hard work.
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At 60, I could do the same things I could do at 30, if I could only remember what those things are.
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When you realize you want to invest the rest of your lifestyle with somebody, you want the rest of your life to commence as quickly as achievable.
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I’m comfortable being old… being black… being Jewish.
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