The more you know the less the better.
BILLY CONNOLLYI used to be a folk singer, but I was… dreadful. I had a voice like a goose farting in the fog.
More Billy Connolly Quotes
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I’ve been a poser for f–ing years. I say, pose your arse off. You know, have a laugh.
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There’s no such thing as bad weather – only the wrong clothes.
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There’s one of a figure with two heads that somebody thought must be a comment on the state of matrimony. None of it is a comment on anything.
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I used to have Mad Cow’s disease, but I’m alright Nooooooooow.
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If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?
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I just believe in the movie. I don’t care what the book was like. I don’t care what the previous film was like or other films were like. I care only about the script I’ve got.
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Tread gently on anyone who looks at you sideways.
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There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.
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The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on us. Apparently, women need to feel loved to have sex. Men need to have sex to feel loved. How do we ever get started.
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I’ve always liked it here. Part of me is Irish. My family comes from the west coast, so whenever I come to Ireland I get a wee tingling in my heart that I’m where I belong.
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I don’t have wild dogs chasing people with scripts away from my door. I get my share. I’ve done okay. But I usually do independent stuff because that’s mostly what I’m offered.
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If you haven’t heard a good rumour by 11:00am, start one.
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Killing a guy and stealing his wife and child isn’t too nice a thing to do.
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I set out to be a cross between Lenny Bruce and Robert the Bruce.
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I decided to stop drinking while it was still my idea.
BILLY CONNOLLY