Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?
BILL WATTERSONHold it. You know what I’d like to see? I’d like to see the three bears eat the three little pigs, and then the bears join up with the big bad wolf and eat Goldilocks and Little Red Riding Hood! Tell me a story like that, OK?
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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Someday, I’d like to meet that little boy… and tell him the awful TRUTH ABOUT THIS PLACE!! Calvin’s Dad: Calvin, be quiet and eat the stupid Lima beans.
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Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
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I’m learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework…procrastinating and negotiation.
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You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D’s in school. Well guess what, I get F’s!!!
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I tell you all this because it’s worth recognizing that there is no such thing as an overnight success.
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If your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.
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Reality continues to ruin my life.
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If you can’t win by reason, go for volume.
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Calvin: Isn’t it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humor? When you think about it, it’s weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity.
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There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.
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Even when you look for it, you’re never prepared for it.
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It’s psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I’ll get a saw.
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Calvin: Sometimes when I’m talking, my words can’t keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we can think faster than we speak? Hobbes: Probably so we can think twice.
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It’s gratifying to hear that from people who care about comic art. I never know what to make of it when someone writes to say, “Calvin and Hobbes is the best strip in the paper. I like it even more than Nancy.”
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I don’t think you’ve ever invited me to… Calvin’s Mom: Calvin, what are you doing? Calvin: Nothing, Mom. Go away. Calvin’s Mom: You’re contagious! You can’t have anyone over to play!
BILL WATTERSON