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If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.

Bill Watterson

Calvin:”It says here that ‘religion is the opiate of the masses.’…what do you suppose that means?” Television: “…it means that Karl Marx hadn’t seen anything yet
BILL WATTERSON

Mean Opiates Television
A day can really slip by when you’re deliberately avoiding what you’re supposed to do.
BILL WATTERSON

Avoiding Hobbies Slips
Reading goes faster if you don’t sweat comprehension.
BILL WATTERSON

Faster Reading Sweat
[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble] Calvin: Ha! I’ve got a great word and it’s on a “Double word score” box! Hobbes: “ZQFMGB” isn’t a word! It doesn’t even have a vowel! Calvin: It is so a word! It’s a worm found in New Guinea!
BILL WATTERSON

Looks Scrabble Vowels
Yakka foob mog. Grug pubbawup zink wattoom gazork. Chumble spuzz. I love loopholes.
BILL WATTERSON

Loopholes Pubbawup
I’d hate to have a kid like me.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Kids Like
I don’t think you’ve ever invited me to… Calvin’s Mom: Calvin, what are you doing? Calvin: Nothing, Mom. Go away. Calvin’s Mom: You’re contagious! You can’t have anyone over to play!
BILL WATTERSON

Anymore Country Mom People Play Think
If people looked at the stars each night, they’d live a lot differently. When you look into infinity, you realize that there are more important things than what people do all day.
BILL WATTERSON

Inspirational Nature Stars
Hobbes: How come we play war and not peace? Calvin: Too few role models.
BILL WATTERSON

Peace Play War
As “Calvin and Hobbes” went on, the writing pushed the drawings into greater complexity.
BILL WATTERSON

Drawing Reality Writing
My problem is that I don’t paint ambitiously. It’s all catch and release – just tiny fish that aren’t really worth the trouble to clean and cook.
BILL WATTERSON

Problem Tiny Trouble
There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.
BILL WATTERSON

Clever Funny Time
Mothers are the necessity of invention.
BILL WATTERSON

Invention Mother Motherhood
If you can’t win by reason, go for volume.
BILL WATTERSON

Reason Volume Winning
Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm’s Thermonuclear League of Liberty.
BILL WATTERSON

Class League Superhero
I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.
BILL WATTERSON

Behavior Encouragement Friendship Modification

If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.

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If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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