I know the world isn’t fair, but why isn’t it ever unfair in my favor?
BILL WATTERSONNow if a joke is in bad taste or it’s not funny, okay, that’s awhole different thing, but how you craft a joke is really what the writer’s job is, and I don’t think that technique should be subject to any editorial constraints.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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Calvin: Today for show and tell, I’ve brought a tiny miracle of nature: a single snowflake!
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I would turn out rough idea after rough idea, and he would veto eighty percent of them. I pretty much prostituted myself for six months but I couldn’t please him, so he sent me packing.
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I hope some historian will confirm that I was the first cartoonist to use the word ‘booger’ in a newspaper comic strip.
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I don’t enjoy lettering very much, but that’s the way I write and that belongs in the strip because the strip is a reflection of me.
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Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.
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The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.
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Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.
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From now on, I’ll connect the dots my own way.
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Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.
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Animals aren’t conditional about friendships. Animals like you just the way you are. They listen to your problems, they comfort you when you’re sad, and all they ask in return is a little kindness.
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You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D’s in school. Well guess what, I get F’s!!!
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It’s not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.
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Buttons … check. Dials … check. Switches … check. Little colored lights … check.
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Calvin: Dad where do babies come from? Dad: Well Calvin, you simply go to Sears, buy the kit and follow the assembly instructions. Calvin: I came from Sears? Dad: No you were a blue-light special at K-Mart – almost as good and a lot cheaper!
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We all have different desires and needs, but if we don’t discover what we want from ourselves and what we stand for, we will live passively and unfulfilled.
BILL WATTERSON