I know the world isn’t fair, but why isn’t it ever unfair in my favor?
BILL WATTERSONFrom now on, I’ll connect the dots my own way.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend.
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I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?
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What’s the point of wearing your favorite rocket ship underpants if nobody ever asks to see ’em?
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I knew you’d win! Oh! Oh! Aarg! [Calvin runs in circles around Hobbes screaming “Aaaaaaaaaaaa”, then falls over.] Hobbes: Look, it’s just a game. Calvin: I know! You should see me when I lose in real life!
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Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I’m cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.
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I suppose if we couldn’t laugh at things that don’t make sense, we couldn’t react to a lot of life.
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But Calvin is no kind and loving god! He’s one of the old gods! He demands sacrifice!
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Surprise is the essence of humor, and nothing is more surprising than truth.
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One of the jokes I really like is that the fantasies are drawn more realistically than reality, since that says a lot about what’s going on in Calvin’s head.
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I thought my life would seem more interesting with a musical score and a laugh track.
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They can’t chain my spirit! My spirit runs free! Walls can’t contain it! Laws can’t restrain it! Authority has no power over it!
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Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm’s Thermonuclear League of Liberty.
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God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.
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I’ve always tried to make the strip animated, even when the characters aren’t moving, with expressions or perspectives or some sort of exaggeration.
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If people looked at the stars each night, they’d live a lot differently. When you look into infinity, you realize that there are more important things than what people do all day.
BILL WATTERSON







