Denying racism is the new racism.
BILL MAHERWho takes care of their people better? FEMA or Hezbollah?
More Bill Maher Quotes
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Like it or not, we’re still a primitive tribe ruled by fears, superstition and misinformation.
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Curious people are interesting people, I wonder why that is.
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Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.’
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As you go down the path of life, ask whats true. Not who else believes it.
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Hot women have to stop putting long paragraphs of text on their bodies. I know you think it’s sexy but one thing that men never think is, “Gee, you know what would make this sex better? Having something to read.”
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I think what’s dangerous is the idea that someone can wash away your sins.
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I don’t say that I’m an atheist. I don’t like that term, because I think it mirrors the certitude of religion. I say I don’t know. And if you don’t know – and you don’t – just man up and say you don’t know. Don’t turn to silly stories and ancient myths.
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Don’t get so tolerant that you tolerate intolerance.
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One of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
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If you think you have it tough, read history books.
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The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he’s the only one in the world who treats me like I’m the Beatles.
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People have to stop saying that just because someone is an anti-gay activist they might be gay. They’re DEFINITELY GAY!!
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I feel terrible for a Palestinian child who dies. But, if it’s your father, your brother or your uncle who was firing those rockets into Israel, whose fault is it really? Do you really expect the Israelis not to retaliate?
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I think flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder.
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You can always tell when Obama’s negotiations with the Republicans are winding down, because he’s missing his watch and his lunch money.
BILL MAHER






