You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That’s like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on.
BILL HICKSWhy is pot against the law? It wouldn’t be because anyone can grow it, and therefore you can’t make a profit off it, would it?
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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At least he f-kin’ jams! If it’s a choice between eternal Hell and good tunes, and eternal Heaven and New Kids on the f-kin’ Block … I’m gonna be surfin’ on the lake of fire, rockin’ out.
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Oh my God. Lift me up out of this illusion, Lord. Heal my perception that I might know only reality and only you.
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How would you like to get inside that guy’s mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn’t he?
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This is where we are at right now, as a whole. No one is left out of the loop. We are experiencing a reality based on a thin veneer of lies and illusions.
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I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your f-kin’ mouth.
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I was a weekend drinker…I’d start on Saturday, end on Friday…thought I was controlling it…but I don’t drink any more.
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Writing, acting, music, comedy. A deep love of literature and books. Thank God for all the artists who’ve helped me.
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Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
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What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
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To me pornography is…spending all your money and not educating the people in America, but spending it instead on weapons.
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Truly, the only stupid people I’ve ever met, the most absolutely clueless, are the very people that produce television.
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Nicotine patches are great. Stick one over each eye and you can’t find your fags.
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When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.
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People are bringing SHOTGUNS to UFO sightings…brings a whole new meaning to that phrase ‘You ain’t from around here, ar’ya?’
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Why is pot against the law? It wouldn’t be because anyone can grow it, and therefore you can’t make a profit off it, would it?
BILL HICKS