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You have to think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you have to know that you’re not.

Bette Midler

I think most of us are torn. We have at least two people at war in our body. One person wants to retire and grow fabulous tomatoes, and the other wants to stand up on a pedestal and be worshipped and get bigger and bigger and bigger until she explodes.
BETTE MIDLER

Thinking Two War
My daughter very independent. But if she’s upset about something, she will absolutely let me know. She’s great – a real tough cookie.
BETTE MIDLER

Daughter Independent Real
For days on end, I would hardly speak, and when I did only the vilest sort of gibberish would spout forth. I became morose and fat. Unapproachable, except when eating – and then only by waiters.
BETTE MIDLER

Depression Eating Speak
We’re all divine, but I was the only one who had the nerve to call myself that.
BETTE MIDLER

Divine Myself Nerves
GOD is watching us, from a Distance.
BETTE MIDLER

Distance God Watching
Cats always seem so very wise, when staring with their half-closed eyes. Can they be thinking, I’ll be nice, and maybe she will feed me twice?
BETTE MIDLER

Funny Nice Wise
Through books and photographs, I saw a world that was not my own – and I realized that there was another world.
BETTE MIDLER

Book Saws World
I’m confident that I’m as intelligent as many people, but I know that I’m not as intelligent as some. So in the presence of hyperintelligent people, I’m a shrinking violet because I don’t want to look like a fool. I know a little about a lot and a lot about a little.
BETTE MIDLER

Intelligent People Shrinking
Even if the whole human race dies off because we keep fighting and killing each other and being heartless, the planet will take care of itself. Eventually, after millions of years.
BETTE MIDLER

Fighting Race Years
If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?
BETTE MIDLER

Funny Hilarious Love
That’s our mission: to clean and green New York City – one block at a time.
BETTE MIDLER

Block Cities Country
I always wanted to be a performer, I didn’t know exactly what kind of performer, all I knew was there were certain things that I liked. I liked movies a whole lot, and I loved music.
BETTE MIDLER

Certain Kind Wanted
I try not to drink too much because when I’m drunk, I bite.
BETTE MIDLER

Drinking Drunk Perspective
I bear no grudges. I have a mind that retains nothing.
BETTE MIDLER

Bears Grudge Mind
Thank God for the gays. I don’t know what would have happened but I know what did happen. Good for them and good for me.
BETTE MIDLER

Gay God Happened Thank
Where did I do well?” When I did this assessment of my life, I said to myself, “It was really good.”
BETTE MIDLER

Assessment Good Life Really

You have to think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you have to know that you’re not.

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You have to think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you have to know that you’re not.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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