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Grit and self-control are related, but they’re not the same thing.

Angela Duckworth

My dad was not super-intentional in his parenting. He was very self-absorbed. I won’t say mean or selfish per se, but very self-absorbed. I think he was just thinking out loud.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Absorbed Dad Intention Parenting Self Super
Why do some people try, try again, and why do some people not? That’s what I’m after.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

After Again People Some Try
I now have Grit Scale scores from thousands of American adults. My data provide a snapshot of grit across adulthood.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Adult Country Girl Scale Score Thousand
Nobody gets to be good at something without effort, no matter what your aptitude is.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Aptitude Effort Get Good Matter Nobody Something
I know a lot of CEOs who are looking for three- to four-year varsity athletes – not necessarily because these people are going to be doing pushups or spiking volleyballs in the workplace, but because they’re looking for that continuity, that person who was gritty about something.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Athlete CEO Four Know Look People Pushup So Spiking Three Varsity Volleyball Year
Very few people can keep going their whole life doing something and feel like it’s merely personally fascinating.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Do Fascinate Feel Few Going Keep Merely People Person Something Very
When I was 27 years old, I left a very demanding job in management consulting for a job that was even more demanding: teaching. I went to teach seventh graders math in the New York City public schools.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Consult Demand Demanding Even Job Management More Old Seven Teaching Twenty Year
Childhood is generally far too early to know what we want to be when we grow up.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Childhood Early Generally Grow Up Know Too
I don’t think that every child in America is going to necessarily aspire to, you know, a four-year degree from a liberal arts college or a certain kind of life. I think that people should learn to be excellent in the thing that they choose to do.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Aspire Country Every Go Know Necessarily Think
I believe kids should choose what they want to do, because it’s their life, but they have to choose something, and they can’t quit in the middle unless there’s a really good reason.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Believe Choose Do Kid Life Middle Quit Something To Unless Want
I’m not a policy oriented person. I’m constrained to what I study. But educational policy has not yet taken adequate note of the whole child. Kids are not just their IQ or standardized test scores. It matters whether or not they show up, how hard they work.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Adequate Child Constrained Education Orientated Ote Person Policy Study Taken Whole
The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Also Good Grit Most Parent Style Thing
You know, the things that I want my own daughters to develop – the idea that we’re going to get there through rewards and punishments seems completely at odds with the idea of character itself.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Character Daughter Develop Idea Itself Punishment Reward Seem Thing
There are no shortcuts to true excellence.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Excellence No Shortcut True
Is it ‘a drag’ that passions don’t come to us all at once, as epiphanies, without the need to actively develop them?
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

All Come Country Develop Drag Need Actively Once Passion People Person
And I’ve discovered a strikingly consistent pattern: grit and age go hand in hand. Sixty-somethings tend to be grittier, on average, than fifty-somethings, who are in turn grittier than forty-somethings, and so on.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Age City Discover Gritter Hand Pattern Something Striking

Grit and self-control are related, but they’re not the same thing.

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Grit and self-control are related, but they’re not the same thing.

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