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People’s lives really do turn out differently. And it certainly can’t be explained by how intelligent you remember them being when they were sitting next to you in organic chemistry class.

Angela Duckworth

Negative feelings are typical of learning, and you shouldn’t feel like you’re stupid when you’re frustrated doing something. You might say to yourself, ‘I can’t do this,’ but you should say, ‘That’s great.’ That means you really have the potential to learn something there.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Facial Feel Feeling Frustrate Learn Like Negative Something Stupid Typical
Childhood is generally far too early to know what we want to be when we grow up.
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Childhood Early Generally Grow Up Know Too
I now have Grit Scale scores from thousands of American adults. My data provide a snapshot of grit across adulthood.
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Adult Country Girl Scale Score Thousand
Psychologists call this the maturity principle. My own life experience fits this principle to a T.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Call Experience Life Maturity Own Principle Pschllogistic
I don’t think that every child in America is going to necessarily aspire to, you know, a four-year degree from a liberal arts college or a certain kind of life. I think that people should learn to be excellent in the thing that they choose to do.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Aspire Country Every Go Know Necessarily Think
If the quality and quantity of continuous effort toward goals matters as much as I think it does, we may actually get more productive, not less, as we get older – even if we can’t pull all-nighters like we used to.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Continue Goal Matter Much Quality Quantity Think Towards
Maybe. But the reality is that our early interests are fragile, vaguely defined, and in need of energetic, years-long cultivation and refinement.
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Cultivation Define Early Energetic Interest Maybe Need Refinement Vaguely
I think the very idea of character, of developing not just grit, but empathy and curiosity, emotional intelligence.
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But Character Develop Emotion Empathy Idea Intelligence Think
And I’ve discovered a strikingly consistent pattern: grit and age go hand in hand. Sixty-somethings tend to be grittier, on average, than fifty-somethings, who are in turn grittier than forty-somethings, and so on.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Age City Discover Gritter Hand Pattern Something Striking
You know, the things that I want my own daughters to develop – the idea that we’re going to get there through rewards and punishments seems completely at odds with the idea of character itself.
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Character Daughter Develop Idea Itself Punishment Reward Seem Thing
Many, many individuals will report starting to form their lifelong interests around adolescence. Why that is, researchers don’t fully know. But if you can take a trip down memory lane and see what interested you, that’s at least a clue as to where your interest may begin to develop.
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Adolescence Around Individual Interest Lifelong Many Report Start
I think the questions on the grit scale about not letting setbacks disappoint you, finishing what you begin, doing things with focus, I think that those are things I would aspire to or hope for for all our children.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Disappoint Finish Focus Girl Let Question Scare Setback Think
We have found a direct correlation between grit and positive emotions, but the fact that I have no evidence that grit is bad for you doesn’t mean it’s not. It’s always a possibility that in the future researchers will discover a downside to grit.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Bad Between Correlation Direct Emotion Evidence Fact Found Grit Men Positive
Boredom is a very self-conscious emotion by definition. Interest is not. So you can actually be completely absorbed in something and, at certain points in your development, not even realize that you’re into it.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Boredom Conscious Definition Emotion Interest Self
I was a good novice teacher, but I did the things that were obvious.
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Good Novice Obvious Teacher Thing
Striving is exhausting. Sometimes I do say things like, ‘I wish I were not quite this driven to be excellent.’ It’s not a comfortable life. It’s not relaxed. I’m not relaxed as a person. I mean, I’m not unhappy. But… it’s the opposite of being comfortable.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Excellent Exhausting Life Quite Say Something Striving Thing Wish
So when my daughter told me on the second track meet that she was done with it because she discovered she didn’t like competing, I made her finish the season.
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Competing Daughter Discover Made Season Second Track Was
People who are really gritty – they’re still interested.
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Gretty Interest People Realy Still
There are so many things that kids care about, where they excel, where they try hard, where they learn important life lessons, that are not picked up by test scores.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Care Excel Hard Important Kid Lesson Many Score Test Thing Try
You cannot will yourself to be interested in something you’re not interested in. But you can actively discover and deepen your interest.
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Actively Deepen Discover Interest Interested Something Yourself
The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.
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Also Good Grit Most Parent Style Thing
To me, the most shocking thing about grit is how little we know, how little science knows, about building it.
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Building Girl Know Little Most Science Shock Thing
There haven’t been genetic studies on grit, but we often think that challenge is inherited but grit is learned. That’s not what science says. Science says grit comes from both nature and nurture.
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Challenge Genetic Girl Inherited Learn Science Studies
When people tell me I can’t do something, I have a visceral reflex to say, ‘Yes, I can.’
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Can People Reflex Say Something Tell Visceral
The most important thing parents can do, although it’s not the only thing they should do, is model the behavior they want from their kids.
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Although Behaviour Do Important Kid Model Paren Thing
Most teachers, when surveyed, say that it is part of their job to help students develop things like grit. This is especially true at the elementary and middle school levels. They feel it’s part of their vocation to teach other things that are not formally academic content.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Develop Grit Job Most Say Student Survey Teacher Thing
I worked hard when I was a consultant. I worked hard when I was in graduate school looking at neuroscience.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Consultant Gratitude Hard Harder Look Neuroscience School Work Worker

People’s lives really do turn out differently. And it certainly can’t be explained by how intelligent you remember them being when they were sitting next to you in organic chemistry class.

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People’s lives really do turn out differently. And it certainly can’t be explained by how intelligent you remember them being when they were sitting next to you in organic chemistry class.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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