If I’d known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can’t remember a single project I would have started.
ANDY ROONEYNever trust the food in a restaurant on top of the tallest building in town that spends a lot of time folding napkins.
More Andy Rooney Quotes
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Civilization means conforming to a standard of behavior that may not seem natural to us.
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Most of the people in the world are good and decent if you give them a chance to be.
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Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
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I’d be more willing to accept religion, even if I didn’t believe it, if I thought it made people nicer to each other but I don’t think it does.
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Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.
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I’ve learned, That money doesn’t buy class.
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Being kind is more important than being right.
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I’ve learned That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
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Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.
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Vegetarian – that’s an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
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Death is a distant rumor to the young.
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I’ve learned that under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
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You can’t be a good writer without being a good thinker.
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Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
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It’s paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone.
ANDY ROONEY