Children always assume the sexual lives of their parents come to a grinding halt at their conception.
ALAN BENNETTI tried to explain to her the significance of the great poet, but without much success,
More Alan Bennett Quotes
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Knowing as their own dusk falls that they will only be remembered for remembering someone else.
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I can walk. It’s just that I’m so rich I don’t need to.
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The longer I practise medicine, the more convinced I am there are only two types of cases: those that involve taking the trousers off and those that don’t.
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I wish they were like the White Rhinosix of them left in the Serengeti National Park, and all males.
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My films are about embarrassment.
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Imagine that. Per person. This means that if the time scale is diminished in proportion to that of space it would be quite possible for the whole story of Greece and Rome to be played out between farts.
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Artists, celebrated for their humanity, they turn out to be scarcely human at all.
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I was an only child. I lost both my parents. By the time I was twenty I was bald. I’m homosexual.
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Cancer, like any other illness, is a bore.
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You don’t put your life into your books, you find it there.
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f they’d been working with Alec Guinness, for instance, they wouldn’t have known they were born if they’d not towed the line!
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One of the hardest things for a teacher to learn is not to try and tell them.
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Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall.
ALAN BENNETT -
There are more microbes per person than the entire population of the world.
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Books are not about passing time. They’re about other lives. Other worlds.
ALAN BENNETT