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Velvet Elvis never puts on weight.

Al Yankovic

One of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with in my career is keeping my material topical even though I only release albums every three or four years.
AL YANKOVIC

Album Career Deel Keep Material Three Topical Year
A lot of artists have really been supportive over the years.
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Supportive Year
There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can’t think of a clever enough idea.
AL YANKOVIC

Candidate Enough Good Idea Ostensibly Parody Song Think
I try to pick songs that I actually like because I realize that I have to live with these songs for a long time, from when I’m working on them in the studio to possibly playing them onstage for the rest of my life.
AL YANKOVIC

Actual Life Long Onstage Pick Possible Realize Rest Song Studio Time Work
If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.
AL YANKOVIC

Avoid Discuss Heat Paper Political Politics Religion Toilet
Somebody will come up to me after a show and have me sign their arm, and the next time I see them my autograph has been permanently inscribed on their arm.
AL YANKOVIC

Arm Autograph Come Next Permanent Show Somebody Time Up
On the other hand, I can get all the Metallica songs I want for FREE! WOW!
AL YANKOVIC

Free Hand On Other Song Want Wow
As it turns out, there is a thing called the Internet, and stuff does go out there whether the suits like it or not.
AL YANKOVIC

Doe Internet Like Out Stuff Suit Turn
I’ve always known that if I recorded an album, it would come out, and people would enjoy it!
AL YANKOVIC

Album Always Come Enjoy Guy People Record Script
I think I’m equally as abusive as the editors normally are for the “Letters and Tomatoes” column, which is the fan mail part of MAD Magazine and an ongoing feature.
AL YANKOVIC

Abusive Column Editor Equally Letter Mad Normal Ongoing Think Tomato
Many years ago I found out something about hamburgers that really grossed me out. You may not know this, so I hope I don’t make you sick, but it turns out hamburgers are actually made out of dead cows.
AL YANKOVIC

Gross Hamburger Many Out Sick Something Year
People that were a little nerdy in high school would look up to me and know it gets better.
AL YANKOVIC

Get Better People School
I know I’m a million times as humble as thou art!
AL YANKOVIC

Art Humble Know Million Time
So I’m one of the few celebrities that got to do a repeat performance on ‘The Simpsons,’ which I’m very flattered by.
AL YANKOVIC

Celebrity Few Flatter Perform Repeat
Take down those naked pictures of Ernest Borgnine.
AL YANKOVIC

Down Naked Picture Take
I know now that everything I write, I’m going to put out, and I’ll have to live with it for the rest of my life.
AL YANKOVIC

Everything Go Life Live Now Out Rest Write

Velvet Elvis never puts on weight.

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Velvet Elvis never puts on weight.

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