“On the other hand, I can get all the Metallica songs I want for FREE! WOW!”

I’m a music fan, and I can listen to the radio, or music, without thinking, “How am I going to screw this up?” [Laughs] If I’m really actively trying to think of a parody, then I’ll have my antenna out, and be a little more proactive about it.

If I could find the right kind of property, get tied in with the right movie, I’d love to be involved, but I just find it hard to be motivated to do another screenplay right now.

I have very mixed feelings about it. On one hand, I’m concerned that the rampant downloading of my copyright-protected material over the Internet is severely eating into my album sales and having a decidedly adverse effect on my career.

Then I try to come up with ideas for parodies. And 99% of those ideas are horrible.

When I started out, I didn’t feel like I was really accepted in the music or comedy communities, and I was somewhere on the edge, but now I feel like I’m accepted in both, which is extremely gratifying.

I don’t like to label myself. I know I’m very hard to pigeonhole.

Velvet Elvis never puts on weight.

I think my chances of ever making it into the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame are about as good as Milli Vanilli’s.

I can’t say enough good things about my band. I feel very fortunate that I found them when I did, very early in my career.

So that’s why one of my rules of parody writing is that it’s gotta be funny regardless of whether you know the source material. It has to work on its own merit.

I try to pick songs that I actually like because I realize that I have to live with these songs for a long time, from when I’m working on them in the studio to possibly playing them onstage for the rest of my life.

That’s a big part of my life – doing things that I’m not prepared to do.

You make me wanna staple bagels to my face, then remove them with a pitchfork.

Well I’ve made no secret of my life long love of MAD Magazine, it’s probably my first and greatest influence in terms of my comic sensibilities. I’ve known John [Ficarra] for many years, and we’ve been friends.

A lot of rap songs don’t usually have a lot of melody per se.

I’m stranded all alone in the gas station of love, and I have to use the self service pump.

as a writer you are free. You are about the freest person that ever was. Your freedom is what you have bought with your solitude, your loneliness.

It reminds me why I chose Dauntless in the first place: not because they are perfect, but because they are alive. Because they are free.

The relentless attempts of totalitarian regimes to prevent free thought and new ideas and the persistent assertion of their own rightness bring on them an intellectual stasis which they project on to the nation at large.

Late hours, nocturnal cigars, and midnight drinkings, pleasurable though they may be, consume too quickly the free-flowing lamps of youth, and are fatal at once to the husbanded candle-ends of age.

Italian journalism is free because it serves one cause and one purpose… mine!

It is not easy for a people conditioned by fear under the iron rule of the principle that might is right to free themselves from the enervating miasma of fear.

There’s this really awesome theory of human motivation – that human beings all want three things. One is to be competent, one is to belong, and one is be free, as in to have choice: to not be told what to do but to choose what to do.

Enter freely and of your own free will!