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I’m stranded all alone in the gas station of love, and I have to use the self service pump.

Al Yankovic

I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem that time that you made it with the whole hockey team.
AL YANKOVIC

Esteem Hockey Little Lost Made Self Team
That’s something the kids should know about. Reading is a gateway to witchcraft and lesbianism.
AL YANKOVIC

Gateway Kid Lesbian Read Something Witchcraft
I don’t want to pooh-pooh modern pop. I appreciate that as well, but my personal favorite kind of music is guitar-based rock. I like grunge and garage bands and alternative music, but that’s more my personal taste.
AL YANKOVIC

Appreciate Favorite Guitar Kind Modern Music Personal Pooh Pop
As a kid, I certainly never thought I would get to spend my life doing something fun.
AL YANKOVIC

Certain Do Fun Kid Something Spend Thought
I start with a comprehensive list of all the recent songs that have been big hits – and then I go down that list and see if I can come up with funny ideas for them. I can always come up with ideas, but not necessarily good ones!
AL YANKOVIC

Been Big Down Hit Idea List Recent Song
By the time I’m in the studio recording my parody, 10,000 parodies of that song are on YouTube.
AL YANKOVIC

Parody Recording Song Studio Time YouTube
On the other hand, I can get all the Metallica songs I want for FREE! WOW!
AL YANKOVIC

Free Hand On Other Song Want Wow
So that’s why one of my rules of parody writing is that it’s gotta be funny regardless of whether you know the source material. It has to work on its own merit.
AL YANKOVIC

Funny Gotta Know Material Merit Parody Regard Rule Source Write
Like, I have had moments, which I think most people have, where you’ll be watching TV, and it’ll be interrupted by some tragic event, and you’ll actually find yourself thinking,
AL YANKOVIC

Fin Yourself Interrupt Moment People Television Think Watch
Doing things that I don’t know how to do, and keep doing them until I get good at them.
AL YANKOVIC

Do Good Know Them Thing Until
I’m watching the charts every week and hoping something will pop into my head.
AL YANKOVIC

Chart Head Hope Pop Something Watch Week Will
I do original songs in the style of other artists, where I try to learn all their musical idiosyncrasies and try to do something that sounds like them and yet is a bit more sick and twisted.
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Feel Idiosyncraisies Learn Like Musical Original Something Song Sound Try Twist
There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can’t think of a clever enough idea.
AL YANKOVIC

Candidate Enough Good Idea Ostensibly Parody Song Think
No Joni Mitchell 8 track tapes in my car.
AL YANKOVIC

Car No Tape Track
I write and write and write, and then I edit it down to the parts that I think are amusing, or that help the storyline, or I’ll write a notebook full of ideas of anecdotes or story points.
AL YANKOVIC

Amuse Down Edit Help Notebook Part Storyline Think Write
Somebody will come up to me after a show and have me sign their arm, and the next time I see them my autograph has been permanently inscribed on their arm.
AL YANKOVIC

Arm Autograph Come Next Permanent Show Somebody Time Up

I’m stranded all alone in the gas station of love, and I have to use the self service pump.

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I’m stranded all alone in the gas station of love, and I have to use the self service pump.

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