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I’m crushed by the responsibility of writing a satirical book.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

But God told me that He/She/It had actually chosen Al Gore by making sure that Gore won the popular vote and, God thought, the Electoral College. ‘That worked for everyone else,’ God said.
AL FRANKEN

Actual Chosen Electoral Everyone God Good Gore Make Popular Sure Thought Vote Work
The Minnesotans I talk to are really concerned about what the future holds for their families.
AL FRANKEN

College Concern Family Future Hold Home Kid Really
I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and dog-gone it, people like me.
AL FRANKEN

Dog Enough Gone Like People Small Smart
Today I will masterbate! Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written “Today I will masterbate–if I want to!
AL FRANKEN

Masturbate Mistake Okay Today Want Written
As someone who’s spent time with our troops in Iraq and Afghanistan on USO tours and met wounded warriors at Walter Reed and Bethesda,
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Country Someone Spent Time Tour Troop Warrior Wound
If you hear, day after day, liberals are rooting against armed forces.
AL FRANKEN

Arm Believe Day Force Liberal Root Soldier Troop
The thing that interests me least about the radio business is the radio business. But I’ve had to learn a little bit about it. It’s not rocket science: You get ratings, that’s good.
AL FRANKEN

Business Good Interest Least Little Radio Rating Rocket Science Thing
It’s easier to put on slippers than to carpet the whole world.
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Carpet Inspirational Put Slipper Whole World
Armed with nothing more than a Facebook user’s phone number and home address.
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Address Arm Facebook Home More Nothing Number Phone
Having an actual income can expand your romantic horizons toward the more appealing end of the spectrum.
AL FRANKEN

Actual Appeal End Expand Horizon Income More Romantic Spectrum
The government must give proper weight to both keeping America safe from terrorists and protecting Americans’ privacy.
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Country Government Keep Knowing Privacy Proper Protect Safe Terrorist Weight
I get satisfaction when I write something I like, when I’m happy with it.
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Get Happ Satisfaction Something Writing
I felt like the luckiest kid in the world. And I was. I was growing up middle-class in a time when growing up middle-class in America meant there would be jobs for my parents.
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Class Country Grow Job Kid Lucky Middle Parent Time Up World
The Freedom of Information Act doesn’t apply to Silicon Valley. And you can’t impeach Google if it breaks its ‘Don’t be evil’ campaign pledge.
AL FRANKEN

Campaign Freedom Google Impeach Information Pledge Silicon Valley
He said we had enough to go three years without making money, and we had enough to go three weeks.
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Enough Making Money Three Week Year
The nature of the Internet and the importance of net neutrality is that innovation can come from everyone.
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Come Everyone Importance Innovation Internet Nature Neutrality

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