The way I see it, I’m not going to Washington to be the 60th Democratic senator. I’m going to Washington to be the second senator from the state of Minnesota.
AL FRANKENFor 35 years I was a writer. I wrote a lot of jokes. Some of them weren’t funny. Some of them weren’t appropriate. Some of them were downright offensive. I understand that.
More Al Franken Quotes
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When I first started writing for television in the seventies and eighties, the Internet didn’t exist.
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The important thing about advice is that it is simply that. Advice.
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Some of my colleagues seem more interested in using every procedural method possible to keep the Senate from doing anything than they are in creating jobs or helping Americans struggling in a difficult economy.
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Does the mainstream media have a liberal bias? On a couple of things, maybe.
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They talked about unreasonable searches and seizures, about keeping the government out of their bedrooms.
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Compared to the American public at large, probably a slightly higher percentage of journalists, because of thier enhanced power of discernment, realize they know a gay person or two, and are, therefore, less frightened of them.
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Being a comedian, you’re under pressure. You have to deal with stress and pressure to perform – to deal with pressure without stress.
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The Fourth Amendment doesn’t apply to corporations.
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No one is more sensitive to the issue of overeating than the creator of Stuart Smalley.
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I’m from the Vietnam generation. I didn’t serve.
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I don’t consider myself an artist necessarily, but craftsmen or people in the arts, their spiritualism is sort of when you’re writing well or performing well or doing whatever you do well.
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I hope you realize, in a democracy, laughter is assent.
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I’ve never understood why we would want to deny all the joys – and the challenges – of marriage to anyone.
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I get satisfaction when I write something I like, when I’m happy with it.
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My spiritual life is… sometimes I have access to it and sometimes I don’t. When I do have access to it, it’s usually a sense of my understanding what the best course of action or the best thing for me to do.
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I’m for Israel’s right to exist.
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The only job they had, which is to give accurate, objective ratings to financial products.
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It’s not preppies, cause I’m a preppie myself. I just don’t like homosexuals. If you ask me, they’re all homosexuals in the Pudding. Hey, I was glad when that Pudding homosexual got killed in Philadelphia.
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Why don’t we focus on what Afghan women can do? They can cook, bear children, and pray. As I recall, that was fine for our grandmothers.
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The point is that there is tremendous hypocrisy among the Christian right. And I think that Christian voters should start looking at global warming and extreme poverty as a religious issue that speaks to the culture of life.
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You see, they love America like a 4-year-old loves his mommy. Liberals love America like grown-ups. To a 4-year-old, everything Mommy does is wonderful and anyone who criticizes Mommy is bad.
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Which is why I think any loving, committed couple — gay or straight — should be able to get married.
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There’s plenty of room for humor in politics, God knows, but it’s a serious business.
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I’ve been a producer and led people. Also, being a comedian, you’re under pressure.
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To ask whether the mainstream media has a conservative or liberal bias is like asking whether al-Qaida uses too much oil in their hummus. It’s – I think they might use too much oil in their hummus – but it’s the wrong question.
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I’m angry at the right wing media. And by that I don’t mean the media is right wing.
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