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I don’t know how many of you have been to New York, but if a building is two blocks away from anything, you can’t see it.

Al Franken

If I put myself on the ballot and even 50 people voted for me, it’d be a travesty.
AL FRANKEN

Ballot Even Myself People Travesty Vote
During Vietnam, I was in college, enjoying my student deferment. The government wisely felt that, in my case, military service was less important than completing my studies to prepare me for my chosen career: comedian.
AL FRANKEN

Career College Country Deferment Enjoy Military Student
Being a comedian, you’re under pressure. You have to deal with stress and pressure to perform – to deal with pressure without stress.
AL FRANKEN

Comedian Deal Perform Pressure Stress Under
I couldn’t think of anything less appealing than molding the minds of tomorrow’s leaders.
AL FRANKEN

Anything Appear Leader Less Mild Mind Think Tomorrow
And we didn’t need to worry about foreign websites illegally distributing the latest TV shows and blockbuster movies online.
AL FRANKEN

Blockbuster Distribute Foreign Latest Movie Online Serial Show Website
And the problem with the mainstream media is that it has these other biases that are much more important.
AL FRANKEN

Bise Dry Kill Mainstream Media Other Person Problem These
We lived in a two-bedroom, one-bath house in St. Louis Park, Minnesota. We weren’t rich – but we felt secure.
AL FRANKEN

Bath Bedroom Felt House Live One Rich Secure Two
The Fourth Amendment doesn’t apply to corporations.
AL FRANKEN

Amendment Apply Corporation Fourth
We basically had dinner every night while watching the news, and then we’d discuss it with our parents.
AL FRANKEN

Basically Dinner Discuss Every News Night Our Parent Watch
The thing that interests me least about the radio business is the radio business. But I’ve had to learn a little bit about it. It’s not rocket science: You get ratings, that’s good.
AL FRANKEN

Business Good Interest Least Little Radio Rating Rocket Science Thing
They’re trying to pay for health care and send their kids to college, they’re worried about declining home values, they’re scared for a loved one they have serving in Iraq.
AL FRANKEN

Care College Country Decline Health Home Kid Pay Scare Send Serve Try Value Worry
Oh, no, you’re kidding.’ I go, ‘No, I’m really honest.’
AL FRANKEN

Go Honest Kidding No Oh Really
Grown-up love means actually understanding what you love, taking the good with the bad and helping your loved one grow.
AL FRANKEN

Actually Bad Good Grown Help Love One Understanding Up
The crash of 2008 was driven in no small part by unfair practices in the mortgage industry which led to many consumers being trapped in loans they didn’t understand and couldn’t afford.
AL FRANKEN

Become Crash Drive Industry led Many Mortgage Part Practice Small Unfair
The way I see it, I’m not going to Washington to be the 60th Democratic senator. I’m going to Washington to be the second senator from the state of Minnesota.
AL FRANKEN

Country Democrat Go Minnesota Second Senator State Way
The Freedom of Information Act doesn’t apply to Silicon Valley. And you can’t impeach Google if it breaks its ‘Don’t be evil’ campaign pledge.
AL FRANKEN

Campaign Freedom Google Impeach Information Pledge Silicon Valley

I don’t know how many of you have been to New York, but if a building is two blocks away from anything, you can’t see it.

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I don’t know how many of you have been to New York, but if a building is two blocks away from anything, you can’t see it.

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