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I have one girlfriend who is dating right now – she’s divorced – and she’s on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that’s not a real game, but it’s my favorite thing to do.

Aisha Tyler

I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living. I actually wanted to be an attorney.
AISHA TYLER

Actually Attorney Comedy Living Something Wanted
I will say that stand-up is my first love; it’s how I got started and is in my bones.
AISHA TYLER

Bone First How Love Say Stand Started Up
I love Toronto. I love it. I love Toronto. I love Canada. I can’t wait to get back. Can’t wait to have some Timbits.
AISHA TYLER

Back Country Some Toronto Wait Waiting
So much of a stand-up’s life is doing live radio and having to be funny and quick on the spot with these strangers, and sort of surgical in terms of how funny I can be in three minutes.
AISHA TYLER

Doing Funny Life Live Minute Much Quick Radio Sou Spot Stand Stranger Surgical Three
Wipe the rivulets of watery drool from your face, and do it again, like an obstinate toddler running against the wall with his head in a bucket.
AISHA TYLER

Again Bucket Drool Fave Heard Rivulet Running Toddler Wall Watery
So everything is all the same job in my eyes, and I don’t want to ever give up any part of it.
AISHA TYLER

Ever Everything Give Job Part Same Want
Wounds turn into scars and scars make you tough.
AISHA TYLER

Experience Human Make Scar Tough Turn Wound
I grew up on the back of a motorcycle – my dad didn’t have a car until I was a teenager. And then my closest friend from grade school was a guy.
AISHA TYLER

Back Car Dad Grade Motorcycle School Teenager
My parents were vegetarians. I’d show up at school, this giant black kid, with none of the cool clothes and a tofu sandwich and celery sticks.
AISHA TYLER

Cloth Kids Parent School Stick Vegetarian
When one is undone—sprawled across the cold tile of a public bathroom in a pool of one’s own vomit, or shivering in the back of a taxi in a pair of urine-soaked skinny jeans with no money for cab fare and a dead cell phone battery.
AISHA TYLER

Cell Doing Funny Girlfriend Phone Quick Radio Spot Stranger Undone
I have one girlfriend who is dating right now – she’s divorced – and she’s on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that’s not a real game, but it’s my favorite thing to do.
AISHA TYLER

Dating Divorce Favorite Game Girlfriend Now Play Real Right Tinder
I love it when I come across a word I don’t know. And I would never treat my audience like they weren’t smart enough to come along with me.
AISHA TYLER

Across Audience Come Enough Know Smart Treat Word
Marriage is a mystery and part of it is just being kind to each other, not being selfish.
AISHA TYLER

Be Each Just Kind Marriage Mystery Other Selfish
I don’t believe in superheroes but I love Batman movies. There’s a part of every person that is entertained by the idealistic, the fantastic.
AISHA TYLER

Batman Believe Entertain Fantastic Idealistic Movie Person Superhero
I like to be nice. I want to be a hero. I want to save people. Or just kill zombies, because they deserve it, because they’re already dead and they can’t feel it. They don’t have feelings.
AISHA TYLER

Deserve Hero Kill Nice People Save Zombie
Real sacrifice. Real disappointment. Real failure. And it requires the ability to scrape your sorry ass up off the floor, stumble to your feet.
AISHA TYLER

Ability Ass Disappointment Feet Floor Real Sacrifice Scrape Sorry Stumble

I have one girlfriend who is dating right now – she’s divorced – and she’s on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that’s not a real game, but it’s my favorite thing to do.

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I have one girlfriend who is dating right now – she’s divorced – and she’s on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that’s not a real game, but it’s my favorite thing to do.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Aisha Tyler Quotes