The girls are beautiful in Hollywood – and enough silicon to caulk a sink.
ADAM FERRARAOh, it may sound crass, but just check the color when you come home. ‘Hi honey. Infernal red? Oh boy, I ain’t getting laid, and I gotta cut the lawn, I know it.’
More Adam Ferrara Quotes
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I love that magazine, man – Victoria’s Secret – and it comes, like, every three hours.
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If you’re in California and it’s raining, stay home, because nobody can drive in the rain. It’s like it’s raining frogs. They’re terrified.
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What if God’s a woman? Not only am I going to hell, I’ll never know why!
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I am a Catholic. Basically, the Catholic religion is ‘If it feels good – stop.’
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Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, ‘How’s it going with that girl?’ ‘One day at a time, man.’
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I woke up my pop in the middle of the night ’cause the boogie man’s under my bed.
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Go to bed.’ ‘Don’t you feel like we’re soul…’
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One day in the shower, you figure it out. It’s a special day in a man’s life. I was like, ‘Oh, I found me a hobby.’
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My favorite Catholic holiday is Easter. For those of you that don’t know, Easter is the day we celebrate Jesus rising from the grave and coming back to Earth as a rabbit that hides colored eggs.
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I love to believe that there’s one god but there’s many different religions so there’s just the question of which long distance company you pick.
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My dad was a big car guy. If you wanted to spend time with my dad, he was working on the car.
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My father tried to give me the sex talk once, and he chickened out. He walked into my room and went, ‘Adam – uh, don’t kiss guys.’
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Men tend to lie when it comes to sexual conquests. You should hear some of the ego-driven lies my friends have told me: ‘Swear to God, man – the hooker gave the money back.’
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I got into cars through my father. He used to work on cars. My job was to hold the light, which pretty much was the limit of my mechanical abilities.
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As soon as you lay down, that’s when the most bizarre things start coming out of her mouth. ‘Goodnight, baby.’ ‘Do you think we were together in a past life?’ ‘Yeah, and I died of sleep deprivation. Go to bed.’ ‘Don’t you feel like we’re soul…’
ADAM FERRARA