“Fame is not your friend. It ain’t necessarily your enemy. It is what it is.”

I wonder what it means when your grandson is more crotchety than you are.

Anyone with a gun can go out and commit an act of terrorism, even without a political affiliation.

We have to confront the very scary fact that the president is a moron. He’s really dumb.

I think there’s a lot of good and bad to L.A. One of the things you have to consider is that you can, if you’re lucky, make a decent living here. That’s a big plus. That’s pretty positive. The weather is OK.

I cannot be made into the commentator for the unspoken black masses.

When I pass, speak freely of my shortcomings and my flaws. Learn from them, for I’ll have no ego to injure.

When the news wants to tell you something is important, they put dramatic theme music behind it. They scare you into watching the story.

Obviously, there’s a million things we’re allowed to say on late-night cable that you’re not allowed to say on a prime time broadcast.

It may sound weird, but I don’t really look for culture, particularly in an American city.

And I’m not so in love with making people mad that I want to live my life around it.

I want the news delivered unbiased. I thought that was the whole point with journalism.

One, I push my deadlines closer than anybody else, or let’s say it this way: I’m really late.

I think revolution is always a little bit possible. I think it won’t look or sound anything like what we would expect. But I think revolution is very difficult, and I’m not optimistic for any kind of dramatic change.

I think you have to play the game on every level. If you need a friendly, charismatic, good-looking guy to be the mouthpiece, then so be it. And maybe Ralph Nader should just be behind the scenes telling that guy what to say.

You can’t accuse the creator of The Boondocks, … Jesus was black, Ronald Reagan was the devil and the government is lying about 9/11.

You know, Democratic and Republican administrations alike have supported individuals and regimes that have slaughtered millions across the globe. And they need to be held accountable for that.