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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

Dick Gregory

If democracy is such a good thing, let’s have more of it.
DICK GREGORY

Democracy Goodness
Hell hath no fury like a liberal scorned.
DICK GREGORY

Angry Hell
It was an unwritten law that black comics were not permitted to work white nightclubs. You could sing and you could dance, but you couldn’t stand flat-footed and talk; that was a no-no.
DICK GREGORY

Black Dance Law Sing Talk Writing
I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
DICK GREGORY

Believe Darkness Myself
I personally would say that the quickest way to wipe out a group of people is to put them on a soul food diet.
DICK GREGORY

Food Myself People Quick Soul
The most difficult thing to get people to do is to accept the obvious.
DICK GREGORY

Acceptance Difficult People Truth
One of the things I keep learning is that the secret of being happy is doing things for other people.
DICK GREGORY

Happiness Learning Oneself People Secret
Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
DICK GREGORY

Beginning Forget Marriage Politics Promise Relationship
When you have a good mother and no father, God kind of sits in. It’s not enough, but it helps.
DICK GREGORY

Enough Father Goodness Help Mom Yourself
I personally believe breathatarianism to be the highest mode of human living breathing in pure air, absorbing the direct light and energies of the sun, bathing in pure water I look at the obituaries every morning and ain’t nobody listed but you eaters.
DICK GREGORY

Believe Breathe Human Light Live Morning Myself Sun
Once I realized the value of making people laugh, I got very good at it. Fast.
DICK GREGORY

Goodness Laugh Myself People Value
There is a limit on how much information you can keep bottled up.
DICK GREGORY

Limitation Yourself
Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
DICK GREGORY

Beginning Forget Politics Promise Relationship
In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago, it’s a sport.
DICK GREGORY

Duty Place Right Sports Vote
No kid in the world, no woman in the world should ever raise a hand against a no-good daddy. That’s already been taken care of: A Man Who Destroys His Own Home Shall Inherit the Wind.
DICK GREGORY

Children Destroy Father Hands Man Wind Woman World
The only good thing about the good old days is they’re gone.
DICK GREGORY

Goodness Past

I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

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