If it wasn’t for Abe Lincoln, I’d still be on the open market.

Dick Gregory

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When I go through the airport and see white women walking through the airport barefooted, like athlete’s feet don’t exist, there’s something wrong.
DICK GREGORY

Existence Foot Myself Woman
Every door of racial prejudice I can kick down, is one less door that my children have to kick down.
DICK GREGORY

Children Oppression Race
It’s cool to be healthy.
DICK GREGORY

Health Instagram Captions One Liner
Everything we do we should look at in terms of millions of people who can’t afford it.
DICK GREGORY

Gratitude People Rich Thankful Worth
Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
DICK GREGORY

Beginning Forget Marriage Politics Promise Relationship
I believe young voters will either vote for Obama or not vote at all. So the problem is not Obama the problem is the system. If you think about how mess up this country is, most folk really don’t have choices.
DICK GREGORY

Believe Choice Mess Myself Problem Vote
I am really enjoying the new Martin Luther King Jr stamp – just think about all those white bigots, licking the backside of a black man.
DICK GREGORY

Black Enjoyment Man Myself
We used to root for the Indians against the cavalry because we didn’t think it was fair in the history books that when the cavalry won it was a great victory, and when the Indians won it was a massacre.
DICK GREGORY

Book Greatness History Thinking Victory Win
You know, I always say white is not a color, white is an attitude, and if you haven’t got trillions of dollars in the bank that you don’t need, you can’t be white.
DICK GREGORY

Attitude Money Need Yourself
There is a limit on how much information you can keep bottled up.
DICK GREGORY

Limitation Yourself
I waited at the counter of a white restaurant for eleven years. When they finally integrated, they didn’t have what I wanted.
DICK GREGORY

Myself Result Wait
You know why Madison Avenue advertising has never done well in Harlem? We’re the only ones who know what it means to be Brand X.
DICK GREGORY

Oneself Secret Yourself
One of the things I keep learning is that the secret of being happy is doing things for other people.
DICK GREGORY

Happiness Learning Oneself People Secret
I never learned hate at home, or shame. I had to go to school for that.
DICK GREGORY

Deep Education Home Learning Myself Shame
I’m not a comic. I’m a humorist.
DICK GREGORY

Career Laughter Myself
In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago, it’s a sport.
DICK GREGORY

Duty Place Right Sports Vote
Home was a place to be only when all other places were closed.
DICK GREGORY

Home Place
I never thought I’d see the day that I would see white folks as frightened, or more so than black folks was during the civil rights movement when we were in Mississippi.
DICK GREGORY

Black Myself People Right Scare See
Coconut milk is the only thing on this planet that comes identically to mother’s milk.
DICK GREGORY

Food Mom
I wouldn’t mind paying taxes – if I knew they were going to a friendly country.
DICK GREGORY

Country Friendship Mindset Myself Pay
If democracy is such a good thing, let’s have more of it.
DICK GREGORY

Democracy Goodness
When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship.
DICK GREGORY

Funny Lost Money Myself Weapon
There’s a God force inside of you that gives you a will to live.
DICK GREGORY

Force God Live Willing Yourself
America will tolerate the taking of a human life without giving it a second thought. But don’t misuse a household pet.
DICK GREGORY

Animal Human Life Tolerance
Hell hath no fury like a liberal scorned.
DICK GREGORY

Angry Hell
My belief is, you know, certain things have to be explained that’s never been explained.
DICK GREGORY

Believe Explanation Myself Philosophy
If it wasn’t for Abe Lincoln, I’d still be on the open market.
DICK GREGORY

Myself Poor

If it wasn’t for Abe Lincoln, I’d still be on the open market.

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If it wasn’t for Abe Lincoln, I’d still be on the open market.

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