I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer
BO BURNHAMWhat’s a pirate minus the ship? just a creative homeless guy
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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Women are like fingers and toes because they’re easy to count on.
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There’s a metal train that a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her. How long til it reaches and kills the driver, provided that he’s a good conductor?
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I think it’s using people, I think it’s like encouraging something that’s unhealthy, telling people you love them. “I love you.” Oh really, you love your fans?
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I like to inject a bit of production value and flair to comedy, or at least to my little corner of comedy.
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Comedy is the one absolutely self-aware art form. Actually, hip-hop’s another one, I suppose. Because in your songs you’re talking about how good a hip-hop artist you are. It’s like a painter painting a panting of himself painting a painting.
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Poetic talent is really easy to fake when thy sentences doth no f-king sense make.
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There’s a certain line between jokes and music and poetry that’s a bit blurred in my mind.
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What’s a pirate minus the ship? just a creative homeless guy
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I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
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What’s that? My six song album entitled Bo Fo Sho is currently available on iTunes? With three songs that have never been heard on the internet? Uh, and if I try to pirate it for free I’ll get AIDS? I would have guessed scurvy. Well, see you later ghost of Dr.Martin Luther King Jr.
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All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.
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It’s not most important to communicate myself on stage as it is to be as funny or interesting as I possibly can on stage.
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I have a pretty good math mind, so I can see patterns, but I don’t have a great ear. It’s like a tragedy – I can see so much more natural musical ability in so many other people.
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Love is all about… whistles.
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People give me money and I don’t know why, my real collection plate is an empty cup held by a homeless guy.
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