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Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I’m cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.

Bill Watterson

I’m learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life…procrastinating and rationalizing.
BILL WATTERSON

Country Friendship People Rationalizing Real Skills
I’d hate to have a kid like me.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Kids Like
Problems often look overwhelming at first. The secret is to break problems into small, manageable chunks. If you deal with those, you’re done before you know it.
BILL WATTERSON

Done Looks Secret
The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that’s even worse
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbies Jobs Secrets
Since September it’s just gotten colder and colder. There’s less daylight now, I’ve noticed too. This can only mean one thing – the sun is going out. In a few more months the Earth will be a dark and lifeless ball of ice. Dad says the sun isn’t going out.
BILL WATTERSON

Dad Dark Daylight Mean Truth
Hobbes: Do you think there’s a God? Calvin: Well, somebody’s out to get me!
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbes Thinking Wells
Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
BILL WATTERSON

Command Information Thorough Useless
It’s a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it’s light out.
BILL WATTERSON

Light Sleep Summer
Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines. Hobbes.
BILL WATTERSON

Numbers Play Special
When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.
BILL WATTERSON

Fun Giving Hilarious
Calvin:”It says here that ‘religion is the opiate of the masses.’…what do you suppose that means?” Television: “…it means that Karl Marx hadn’t seen anything yet
BILL WATTERSON

Mean Opiates Television
I keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.
BILL WATTERSON

Littles Nice People
Calvin: Know what I pray for? Hobbes: What? Calvin: The strength to change what I can, the inability to accept what I can’t, and the incapacity to tell the difference.
BILL WATTERSON

Differences Inability Praying Strength
Animals aren’t conditional about friendships. Animals like you just the way you are. They listen to your problems, they comfort you when you’re sad, and all they ask in return is a little kindness.
BILL WATTERSON

Animal Ask Friendship Kindness Problem
Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
BILL WATTERSON

Demand Ecstasy Enough
Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
BILL WATTERSON

Contact None Sometimes Think Universe

Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I’m cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.

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Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I’m cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.

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Popular Authors

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