But where did this veneration of childbirth come from? I missed that meeting. Childbirth is wonderful, childbirth is a miracle. Wrong. It’s no more a miracle than eating food and a turd coming out your ass.
BILL HICKSIs it my business if somebody wants to burn a flag?…No, it’s not…That’s called logic and it’ll help us all evolve.
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.
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The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
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I don’t mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that’s how it comes out.
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Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
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Speaking of Satan, I was watching Rush Limbaugh the other day.
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I got this big fear of doing smoking jokes in my act and showing up five years from now goin’ [puts mic to his neck and speaks as if he had a mechanical larynx] ‘good evening everybody, remember me, smoking’s bad. [puts cigarette to neck and mimics smoking it] Eeww.
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I believe that the Bible is the literal word of God. And I say no, it’s not, Dad. Well, I believe that it is. Well, you know, some people believe they’re Napoleon. That’s fine. Beliefs are neat. Cherish them, but don’t share them like they’re the truth.
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I don’t identify with anyone historically, but there are several people in the future who I am a dead ringer for.
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There is a 3rd point of view on the gun control issue – those who I refer to as THE VICTIMS – but they remain strangely silent.
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Why is pot against the law? It wouldn’t be because anyone can grow it, and therefore you can’t make a profit off it, would it?
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You’re not a human till you’re in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.
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Keith Richards outlived Jim Fixx, the runner and health-nut dude. The plot thickens.
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Are gun rights advocates arguing that roving gangs…shooting innocent bystanders constitutes a ‘well-regulated militia’?
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I’m not into those kind of rivalries. I remember standing out in front of Stratford, minding my own business. Carload of about eighty kids would pull up.
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The CIA has a plot…they’ve used before to get rid of world leaders. Only problem…is convincing Hussein…to fly to Dallas.
BILL HICKS