Nothing worse than a piece of dried out fish.
BOB SAGETNothing worse than a piece of dried out fish.
BOB SAGETI have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them
BOB SAGETAll I’ve ever done is try to entertain my way through a life that often has a huge amount of heaviness in it.
BOB SAGETI have no agenda, nothing to control.
BOB SAGETNobody can tell me what I can or can’t do, except they can.
BOB SAGETAnd turkeys are a bird. A very nervous bird. You’d be nervous too if you knew that one day you’d get your head cut off and… filled with stuffing.
BOB SAGETPeople do what they do to each other and they feed on it.
BOB SAGETThe favorite method of vice is to diss all responsibility be work or social, go off by myself, and enjoy a good steak and a great glass of wine. Oh yeah, and my kids are there too.
BOB SAGETI’m psyched about what I can contribute that can be meaningful to myself and to others.
BOB SAGETWhat do you do if you’re in the car and your girlfriend touches your crotch then asks you to remind her to get kitchen scissors?
BOB SAGETMy dad told me if I was ever intimidated by anyone, just picture them with their clothes off. He said that’s how he dealt with my mom.
BOB SAGETWhat I have now are good problems of trying to decide and what I really want to do is good work next. My phone’s ringing a lot more and I’ve got nine lines so when it doesn’t ring, it’s very frustrating.
BOB SAGETMy wife is a saint. She’s Gandhi. She walks around in diapers and won’t eat.
BOB SAGETPaul Riser tells it in an interesting way; he dissects it and tells the structure, you know, ‘you don’t mention that part here.’ But that’s what’s interesting about it and the people who are absent are interesting too.
BOB SAGETMet a girl the other nite and told her- Before you can be with someone you have to know the value of yourself. So does $200 seem reasonable?
BOB SAGETStop It, stop lighting your butthol on fire, and everybody listen to me. If you light your ass on fire, I hope you have boxers or a filter of somekind, because if your a bareass person.
BOB SAGET