It’s money. I remember it from when I was single
BILLY CRYSTALGood news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck’s puff pastries.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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I used to limp around my neighborhood imitating him. I did my Bar Mitzvah with an Oklahoma drawl.
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Dad had a music store, and he’d often bring home comedy albums that I would listen to. I started listening to Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby, and developing taste. They really influenced my style of comedy.
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When I’ve gotten criticism, it’s that it’s too long, too soft, didn’t hit the government hard enough. Then when I do hit the government, they go, What’s he doing hitting the government?
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Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
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What’s so fascinating and frustrating and great about life is that you’re constantly starting over, all the time, and I love that.
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It is better to look good than to feel good.
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From the first time I saw Sid Caesar be funny I knew that’s what I had to do.
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Bambi, to a kid, was scary.
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If you do something for the first time, you will always remember it. If your Dad has something to do with it, you write about it.
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When we had the girls, my daughter Jenny gave us like a Bible from my daughter of, “Don’t feed them this; don’t feed them that, if she says this, don’t say that,” It was crazy!
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In high school, I was the class comedian as opposed to the class clown. The difference is the class clown is the guy who drops his pants at the football game, the class comedian is the guy who talked him into it.
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Kids need a happy household. They need to be loved and supported in their dreams. And I don’t think you can make your kids’ dreams your own. They need you to support them in their dreams.
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I have 40-something intros [that Davis Jr. did]; all are different, none of them happened. And it was hilarious.
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A laugh is a weird sound, and when you get a couple thousand people making it at once, it’s really strange. But when I can feel proud of myself for causing it, it’s great.
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I’m comfortable being old… being black… being Jewish.
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Nobody is more truthful when he’s acting than De Niro.
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When you realize you want to invest the rest of your lifestyle with somebody, you want the rest of your life to commence as quickly as achievable.
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[I did impressions] of relatives because I heard so many different sounds. My dad was in the music business and of course my uncle was a giant [music producer], but my dad in particular had the house filled with these Dixieland jazz stars.
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By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere.
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At some point I stopped stand-up because I didn’t have something to say on a nightly basis.
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You really have to have some muscle to be on the stage in front of the world.
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Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I’d always go off book and start improvising.
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I’m married – I’ve caught my limit.
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Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck’s puff pastries.
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At 60, I could do the same things I could do at 30, if I could only remember what those things are.
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I started examining history and then everything related to the theater. History, art, all the other studies, if I could link them into the theater, then it became alive for me. It just opened up my eyes.
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