If you’re hanging out with two negative people, do they equal one positive person?
BOB SAGETIt was a JOB; the video show was a JOB; you don’t tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o’clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too.
More Bob Saget Quotes
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If I ever die, I want it to be cause I got hit by a car saving a kid.
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Yet there are some people – Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he’s a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I’m doing it right now and you all seem bored.
BOB SAGET -
Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you’re the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in public.
BOB SAGET -
I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.
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That was not Bob Saget. His comedic style is definitely more twisted, and he has an edgier side than he showed in Full House.
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25, 30 years ago, that meant something, they were making some money. And they were doing all sorts of comedy, screaming at the audience, basically crowd control. And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.
BOB SAGET -
I don’t censor myself, but I don’t want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.
BOB SAGET -
Stop It, stop lighting your butthol on fire, and everybody listen to me. If you light your ass on fire, I hope you have boxers or a filter of somekind, because if your a bareass person.
BOB SAGET -
I’m a believer that when one door closes another one opens. But why does the one opening always hit me full-speed-knob-first into my nuts?
BOB SAGET -
They say, Keep your enemies closer. But what if you live with them?
BOB SAGET -
I love telling stories and acting and entertaining people. I don’t want to make fun of people.
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Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET -
It’s so nice to share a day as beautiful as this one with hundreds of thousands of reckless drivers.
BOB SAGET -
The favorite method of vice is to diss all responsibility be work or social, go off by myself, and enjoy a good steak and a great glass of wine. Oh yeah, and my kids are there too.
BOB SAGET -
I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.
BOB SAGET






