Any organization created out of fear must create fear to survive.
BILL HICKSYou ever noticed how people who believe in Creationism look really un-evolved? You ever noticed that? Eyes real close together, eyebrow ridges, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day”. Yeah, looks like He rushed it
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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I, like all artists in Western cultures, am a shaman…come in the guise of a comic…to heal perception by using…’jokes’.
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You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: “Iraq: incredible weapons – incredible weapons.” How do you know that? “Uh, well… we looked at the receipts.”
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If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them.
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I wouldn’t give Satan a snowball’s chance in Hell against a woman’s ego.
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You’re not a human till you’re in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.
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Marijuana: a drug that kills … no one – and let’s put it in a time frame – ever. Illegal.
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Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally on our planet, serves a thousand different functions, all of them positive. To make marijuana against the law is like saying that God made a mistake.
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Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
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The war on drugs to me is absolutely phoney, its so obviously phoney, ok? It’s a war against our civil rights, that’s all it is. They’re using it to make us afraid to go out at night, afraid of each other, so that we lock ourselves in our homes and they get suspending our rights one by one.
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I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind’s sole purpose on this planet. If you’re wondering what I believe our purpose on this planet is, I’ll give you a hint… it has to do with creating and sharing.
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I’m tired of this back-slappin’ “isn’t humanity neat” bullshit. We’re a virus with shoes.
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You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That’s like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on.
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Women priests. Great, great. Now there’s priests of both sexes I don’t listen to.
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You ever noticed how people who believe in Creationism look really un-evolved? You ever noticed that? Eyes real close together, eyebrow ridges, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day”. Yeah, looks like He rushed it
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That’s why I always recommend a psychedelic experience because it makes you realize that all you’ve learned is in fact just learned and not necessarily the truth.
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I need my sleep. I need about eight hours a day, and about ten at night.
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May I suggest, instead of a war to feel better about yourself, perhaps… sit-ups? Maybe a fruit cup? Eight glasses of water a day?
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The best kind of comedy to me is when you make people laugh at things they’ve never laughed at, and also take a light into the darkened corners of people’s minds, exposing them to the light.
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We’ll see who believes in me now. I am the Prankster God – I am killing me!
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We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution.
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[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is…thinking, ‘This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.’
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How are we gonna justify arms dealing when we realize that we’re all one?
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I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.
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The role of the comedian is to say ‘Wait a minute’ when a consensus starts to form.
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It has become more and more obvious that there is one political party in America, and that is The Business Party.
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I love the Pope, I love seeing him in his Pope-Mobile, his three feet of bullet proof plexi-glass. That’s faith in action folks! You know he’s got God on his side.
BILL HICKS