black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

Rock stars hawking Diet Cokes–are demons set loose on the Earth to lower the standards for the perfect & holy children of God!

Bill Hicks

Mushrooms grow on cow turds. I love that. I think that’s why you giggle the first hour.
BILL HICKS

Cow Mushroom Thinking
Nicotine patches are great. Stick one over each eye and you can’t find your fags.
BILL HICKS

Cigarette Smoke Eye Smoking
The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
BILL HICKS

Doctor Funny Humor
I used to love to call L.A. when I lived in New York… Is that the Big One I hear in the background? Bye, you lizard scum! Bye!
BILL HICKS

Bye Country
I’m glad mushrooms are against the law, because I took them one time, and you know what happened to me? I laid in a field of green grass for four hours going, “My God! I love everything.” Yeah, now if that isn’t a hazard to our country…
BILL HICKS

Country Happened Law Mushrooms
I ascribe to Mark Twain’s theory that the last person who should be President is the one who wants it the most. The one who should be picked is the one who should be dragged kicking and screaming into the White House.
BILL HICKS

Funny Humor Ideas Revolutionary
Supreme Court says pornography is anything without artistic merit that causes sexual thoughts, that’s their definition, essentially. No artistic merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm… Sounds like… every commercial on television, doesn’t it?
BILL HICKS

Essentially Thinking Trying Two
What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
BILL HICKS

Abortion Say Talk Thing
I am a misanthropic humanist… Do I like people? They’re great, IN THEORY.
BILL HICKS

Misanthropic People Theory
How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again? …Seventy percent. What the fuck? Where did they take this poll, at an S&M parlor?
BILL HICKS

Jobs People Vote
We’ll see who believes in me now. I am the Prankster God – I am killing me!
BILL HICKS

Believe Killing Pranksters
I used to drink, I did, I had to quit. Man, I was an embarrassing drunk. I’d get pulled over by the cops, I’d be so drunk I’d be out dancing to their lights thinking I’d made it to another club.
BILL HICKS

Embarrassing Light Men Thinking
I’m totally confused about what I’m going to do with my life.
BILL HICKS

Confused Going Life Totally
I’ve learned a lot about women. I think I’ve learned exactly how the fall of man occured in the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden, and Adam said one day, Wow, Eve, here we are, at one with nature, at one with God, we’ll never age.
BILL HICKS

Dream Exactly Fall Learned Men Women
Isn’t that weird, we’ve made nature against the law. That’s how un-natural we’ve become.
BILL HICKS

Law Made Natural
Marijuana grows naturally…Don’t you think making nature against the law seems a bit, I don’t know, unnatural?
BILL HICKS

Law Marijuana Thinking

Rock stars hawking Diet Cokes–are demons set loose on the Earth to lower the standards for the perfect & holy children of God!

Related Topics

Popular Authors

Rock stars hawking Diet Cokes–are demons set loose on the Earth to lower the standards for the perfect & holy children of God!

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Hicks Quotes