My brain is like a cross between a colander and a Lazy Susan – thin, slow, and it leaks.
RON WHITEI write these shows one joke at a time. There’s no continuity. I do try to figure an order to the stories, but there’s not continuity.
More Ron White Quotes
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Television is 15 hour days. Movies are 18 hour days. And it’s 18 hours of doing not a thing.
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Ultimately I’m the writer for me, but also, anytime one of my friends gets stuck with a bit, they can call me, and I’m pretty good at helping them get there.
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The only way to stay sharp is to do live shows. There is no part-time comedy.
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I really understood a lot more about comedy after listening to Bill Hicks, who died at 32 years old. He’s probably the best comedian who ever lived. Although you can’t say that because of Carlin, Cosby and Pryor.
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I’d rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
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I consider it an honor and a privilege to give back however I can for the many sacrifices of these incredibly brave men and women.
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If I sit down to write a joke about, whatever, the polluted Gulf of Mexico, it comes out mundane to me.
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I was a huge fan of comedy when I was a child.
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I think honest communication, no matter where it comes from, is positive for a relationship.
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There have been times in my life that I’ve had a ton of vices, and my demons have run amok for years and years and years.
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I guarantee there’s people who watch television who have no idea how complicated it is to make a television show.
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I’ve got a role in the new Billy Bob Thornton movie that Billy Bob wrote and is going to direct called ‘Jayne Mansfield’s Car.’ I only have four scenes, but I have as much dialogue as anybody in the movie.
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I was always a funny guy. I don’t think anybody that makes it to this level of stand-up wasn’t a funny guy when they were young.
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Somebody the other day had a review, called me ‘America’s reprobate.’ And I don’t even know what that means, but I kinda like the way it sounds.
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I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
RON WHITE