“My dad was a terrible businessman.”

Love takes attention and work and is the best thing in the world.

I’m a bit of a shill for the Clinton Administration, which has its perks. I’m invited to all the inaugural balls.

In our political system, money is power. And that means a few can have a lot more power than the rest.

They’re trying to pay for health care and send their kids to college, they’re worried about declining home values, they’re scared for a loved one they have serving in Iraq.

Medicare was established to secure that promise.

I know I have an awful lot to learn from the people of Minnesota.

For 35 years I was a writer. I wrote a lot of jokes. Some of them weren’t funny. Some of them weren’t appropriate. Some of them were downright offensive. I understand that.

Most of us here in the media are what I call infotainers…

Anyone with an Internet connection and a few dollars can obtain personal information they should never have access to, including a user’s date of birth, e-mail address, or estimated income.

My dad never graduated high school. He was a printing salesman.

I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and dog-gone it, people like me.

I am a Minnesotan, and not just because I root for the Vikings and the Twins. I like the Minnesota-nice sensibility.

We need to be pro-science; we have to go back to science.

I think there are all kinds of different hells. It’s not a place you go to after you die.

I don’t think I’m an angry person. I think I’m a person who’s angry. I’m angry at the Bush administration;

I felt like the luckiest kid in the world. And I was. I was growing up middle-class in a time when growing up middle-class in America meant there would be jobs for my parents.

I’m a big believer in dreaming. If you don’t dream it, you can’t become it.

I am a businessman. This is what I do each and every day. I love it. I love coming to work. I never have a bad day.

The thing I love about Donald, it’s time this country is run by a businessman and not people with their hands out, and Donald doesn’t have his hands out.

In the United States businessmen often do not trust their colleagues.

The small businessman is smart; he realizes there’s no free lunch. On the other hand, he knows where to go to get a good inexpensive sandwich.

The artist as businessman is uglier than the businessman as artist.

If you are a businessman or a politician in Iran, you can get a visa as quickly as you ask for it.

A businessman cannot force you to buy his product; if he makes a mistake, he suffers the consequences; if he fails, he takes the loss. If bureaucrat makes a mistake, you suffer the consequences; if he fails, he passes the loss on to you.