“A church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.”

If you are looking for a kindly, well-to-do older gentleman who is no longer interested in sex, take out an ad in The Wall Street Journal.

Some People are more turned on by money than they are by love. In one respect they’re alike. They’re both wonderful as long as they last.

Psychotherapy, unlike castor oil, which will work no matter how you get it down, is useless when forced on an uncooperative patient.

In Biblical times, a man could have as many wives as he could afford. Just like today.

Cruel words erode the self-esteem like the ocean eats away the shore.

Kissing power is stronger than will power.

How should they answer?

Kids grow up awfully fast these days,”she said. “You should try to have a good relationship with your kids, no matter what they do.

It is a sad commentary of our times when our young must seek advice and counsel from ‘Dear Abby’ instead of going to Mom and Dad.

Loneliness is the ultimate poverty.

Wisdom doesn’t automatically come with old age. Nothing does – except wrinkles. It’s true, some wines improve with age. But only if the grapes were good in the first place.

While forbidden fruit is said to taste sweeter, it usually spoils faster.

Fighting fire with fire only gets you ashes!

It is almost impossible to throw dirt on someone without getting a little on yourself

The less you talk, the more you’re listened to.

If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.

Monica Langley has a great piece in The Wall Street Journal about how they’re trying to create different kinds of moments for Donald Trump, as opposed to just him shouting at rallies.

Im known for snatchin’ purses and bombin’ churches I get more pussy on accident then most niggas get on purpose

Church is what you do. Church is who you are. Church is the human outworking of the person of Jesus Christ. Let’s not go to Church, let’s be the Church.

The Gates of Hell shall not prevail against it.

In 1835 at Kirtland I learned from my Sisters Husband Lyman R. Shirman, who was close to the Prophet and Received it from him. That the ancient order of plural marriage was again to be practiced by the Church.

It’s nowhere near as intense as what I imagine an actor experiences backstage, but I feel a fluttering nervousness before a curtain goes up on a play. I mean, any play, anywhere – on Broadway or the Bowery or in a church basement.

You may invite the entire 35th Division to your wedding if you want to. I guess it’s going to be yours as well as mine. We might as well have the church full while we are at it.

But I make a distinction between the doctrines of the Church, which matter, and the structure invented by half a dozen Italians who got to be pope and which is of very little use to anybody.