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Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.

Lily Tomlin

Did you know, in the entire universe, we are the only intelligent life forms thought to have a Miss Universe contest?
LILY TOMLIN

Form Intelligence Life Universe Yourself
We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.
LILY TOMLIN

Believe Freedom Hands Man Reason Sex Walk
I bought a box of animal crackers, but there was nothing inside. They’d eaten each other.
LILY TOMLIN

Animal Eat Food Funny Myself
9 to 5 made people aware of equal pay for equal work. It hasn’t really happened, but it has come closer.
LILY TOMLIN

Equality Money Pay People Work
I have always felt that humor was a wonderful vehicle to let us become connected with each other and ourselves; I try to portray the similarities and polarities in men and women, so that we can acknowledge and embrace our collective consciousness.
LILY TOMLIN

Collection Conscious Feeling Humor Vehicle Wonderful
The road to success is always under construction.
LILY TOMLIN

Construction Inspirational Road Success
Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
LILY TOMLIN

Leadership Reality Touch
The best mind-altering drug is the truth.
LILY TOMLIN

Best Drugs Mindset One Liner Truth
I try to be cynical, but it’s so hard to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Hard Myself Try
I feel some part of me can wake up and be very existential and the next day wake up and be sort of in love with the universe.
LILY TOMLIN

Existence Feeling Love Universe Wake Up
Having a real public outlet is how you imprint something for yourself. It’s just a matter of timing. It’s like you’ve marked your territory.
LILY TOMLIN

Place Public Reality Time Yourself
Every day I read the newspapers, and no matter how cynical I get, it’s imposssible to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Impossible Myself News Reading
Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Funny Myself Serious
If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
LILY TOMLIN

Love Question Yourself
Being a New Yorker is never having to say you are sorry.
LILY TOMLIN

Place Sorry Yourself
Infinity is just time on an ego trip.
LILY TOMLIN

Ego Infinity One Liner Time Trip

Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.

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Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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