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Dorothy Parker Quote - The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.

The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death God
Said after she had been seriously ill: The doctors were very brave about it.
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Brave Doctor Serious
Telegram to a friend who had just become a mother after a prolonged pregnancy: Good work, Mary. We all knew you had it in you.
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Friendship Mom Pregnant Yourself
A girl’s best friend is her mutter.
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Best Friendship Girl Herself
Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.
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Clean Dirty Hands Nature Play Target Yourself
There is entirely too much charm around, and something must be done to stop it.
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Around Charm Done Stop
[On being shown an apartment by a real estate agent:] Oh, dear, that’s much too big. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
DOROTHY PARKER

Big Enough Friendship Funny Home Need Place Room
I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it’s so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Easy Love People Sweet Yourself
If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you.
DOROTHY PARKER

Appearance Clothes Fashion Party Yourself
Ridicule may be a shield, but it is not a weapon.
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Armor Protection Safety Weapon
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
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Acceptance Leaving Myself
Ducking for apples — change one letter and it’s the story of my life.
DOROTHY PARKER

Change Funny Life Myself Oneself Sex Story
That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Language No Talk Woman
Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.
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Challenge Honesty Survive Test Yourself
Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
DOROTHY PARKER

Action Hate Hell Identity Love Myself Yourself
It turns out that, at social gatherings, as a source of entertainment, conviviality, and good fun, I rank somewhere between a sprig of parsley and a single ice-skate.
DOROTHY PARKER

Entertainment Fun Goodness Myself

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