Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.
DOROTHY PARKERQuick!! Act as if nothing has happened!
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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A girl’s best friend is her mutter.
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Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.
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If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be at all surprised.
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Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
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Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness.
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If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.
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This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.
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Quick!! Act as if nothing has happened!
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Telegram to a friend who had just become a mother after a prolonged pregnancy: Good work, Mary. We all knew you had it in you.
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If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.
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All I say is, nobody has any business to go around looking like a horse and behaving as if it were all right. You don’t catch horses going around looking like people, do you?
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The only “ism” Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
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It’s not the tragedies that kill us; it’s the messes.
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I can’t write five words but that I change seven.
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Oh, seek, my love, your newer way; I’ll not be left in sorrow. So long as I have yesterday, Go take your damned tomorrow!
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Writing well is the best revenge.
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There’s a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
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Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
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I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I’m under the table/After four I’m under my host.
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You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.
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And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.
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Said after she had been seriously ill: The doctors were very brave about it.
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It was written without fear and without research.
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The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
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Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
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The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.
DOROTHY PARKER